#1 humor site on the 'net

Chimney Sweep Challenge

Wanted: One athletic chimney sweep with flexible hours

Chimney Sweep Challenge thanks to Mike King

QuotaBills
Camouflage: Wise guise. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Everyone needs a fantasy. - Andy Warhol

Imagination rules the world. - Napoleon

You have to hold onto your fantasy. - Betsey Johnson

Worry is a waste of the imagination. - Unknown

Imagination is more important than knowledge. - Albert Einstein

Before imagination can flow, you must let go. - Unknown

A financier is a pawnbroker with imagination. - Arthur Pinero

The human race is governed by its imagination. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Live out of your imagination, not your history. - Stephen Covey

Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. - H L Mencken

The possible's slow fuse is lit by the imagination. - Emily Dickinson

An Irishman's heart is nothing but his imagination. - George Bernard Shaw

Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality. - Jules de Gaultier

The Possible's slow fuse is lit
By the Imagination. - Emily Dickinson

Liberty: One of Imagination's most previous possessions. - Ambrose Bierce

The success that the Tolkien books had redefined modern fantasy. - George R.R. Martin

I always had a fantasy of being a chef, because I like kitchen life. - Geoffrey Rush

I have too many fantasies to be a housewife. I guess I am a fantasy. - Marilyn Monroe

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination. - Oscar Wilde

You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus. - Mark Twain

Our imagination is the only limit to what we can hope to have in the future. - Charles F. Kettering

Every great advance in science has issued from a new audacity of imagination. - John Dewey

Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life's coming attractions. - Albert Einstein

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge. - Daniel J. Boorstin

Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure. - Scott Adams

Cowardice... is almost always simply a lack of ability to suspend functioning of the imagination. - Ernest Hemingway

Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist but you have ceased to live. - Mark Twain

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet. - Woody Allen

Sometimes people don't want to hear the truth because they don't want their illusions destroyed. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Attachment is the great fabricator of illusions; reality can be attained only by someone who is detached. - Simone Weil

Music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and life to everything. - Plato

A certificate of live birth is not the same thing by any stretch of the imagination as a birth certificate. - Donald Trump

Fatalism is the creed of a will that is dying to its possibilities and seeks to drag the imagination with it. - Ravi Zacharias

All cartoon characters and fables must be exaggeration, caricatures. It is the very nature of fantasy and fable. - Walt Disney

Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but it tones up the muscles that can. - Terry Pratchett

The poet is in command of his fantasy, while it is exactly the mark of the neurotic that he is possessed by his fantasy. - Lionel Trilling

In retrospect, all these exercises in self-gratification seem pure fantasy, what Pascal called 'licking the earth.' - Malcolm Muggeridge

My imagination persisted in sticking horrors into the dark- so I stuck my imagination into the dark instead, and let it look out at me. - F Scott Fitzgerald

Music is amoral law. It gives soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and charm and gaiety to life and to everything. - Plato


Business School Basics

Waterwheel Rotisserie

Elephant Bus

Promote Yourself

Time Machine

Redneck Engagement Ring

Forever Clean Toilet

Edible Clock

Up-Set & Hungry Trucks

Bear Pinata

Swim Vacation

What Are Your Skills?

Portable Barber Shop

Snail Trail

Anger Release Machine

Pun-e Signs

Wake Me At Noon

Pringle Art

Lodge Welcome

Holstein or Holestein?

Dead Poirot

Restroom Fragrance

Word Puzzle Clock

Scenic Western Pennsylvania