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Baby Delivery

When the stork becomes outdated

Baby Delivery thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Birth patrol pills. - Archie Bunker

Hasta la vista, baby. - Terminator 2: Judgement Day

Baby lying in the bassinoot. - Archie Bunker

Stoic: De boid what brings de babies - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Ballroom: A nursery for crying babies - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A baby's laugh is an angel's voice. - Unknown

Infancy conforms to nobody; all conform to it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

From the prairies, to the oceans, wide with foam - Archie Bunker

De-caffeinated: What a cow gets when it has a baby - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Man's main task in life is to give birth to himself. - Erich Fromm

My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on. - Joan Rivers

You take more pictures of your baby than NASA does of Mars. - Unknown

One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control. - Rodney Dangerfield

There is no cure for birth and death, save to enjoy the interval. - George Santayana

Having a baby is like trying to push a grand piano through a transom. - Alice Roosevelt Longworth

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Insomnia: a contagious disease often transmitted from babies to parents. - Shannon Fife

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he is a baby. - Natalie Wood

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby. - Natalie Wood

Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born? - Benny Hill

The most effective form of birth control I know is spending the day with my kids. - Jill Bensley

Having a baby is like falling in love again, both with your husband and your child. - Tina Brown

The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby. - Mary Marsh

If newborn babies could speak they would be the most intelligent beings on planet earth. - Jaden Smith

Feedback: The inevitable result when your baby doesn’t appreciate the strained carrots - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When I go home, I play with my baby dolls and strollers and diaper bags, and play with my sisters. - Dakota Fanning

Sprouts: Innocent green plants snatched in their infancy and devoured alive by ravenous vegetarians - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby. - Jim Gaffigan

A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. - Enid Bagnold

This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer. - Will Rogers

One thing I had learned from watching chimpanzees with their infants is that having a child should be fun. - Jane Goodall

It's been a tough week. I bought myself a memory foam mattress and now it's trying to blackmail me. - Gary Delaney

Milk is the drink of babies, tea the drink of women, water the drink of beasts, and wine is the drink of the gods. - John S Blackie

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. - Sam Levenson

Since people are going to be living longer and getting older, they'll just have to learn how to be babies longer. - Andy Warhol

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to squeeze in eight hours of TV a day. - Homer Simpson

As an experienced artist, I carry my work like a secret pregnancy. I am always aware of inner life and the need to protect it. - Julia Cameron

No one ever wants to see his or her name linked to anything bad. Conscience is like a baby. It has to go to sleep before you can. - Harvey Mackay

The wise man is but a clever infant, spelling letters from a hieroglyphical prophetic book, the lexicon of which lies in eternity. - Thomas Carlyle


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