#1 humor site on the 'net

All Weather Runner

Hypothermia 101 for the dubm-erererest

All Weather Runner thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Head Cold: Rheum service - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I was so cold I almost got married. - Shelley Winters

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted. - Mae West

Never underestimate the value of cold cash. - Gregory Nunn

Room service - don't send up any more ice. - WC Fields

Climate is what we expect. Weather is what we get. - Mark Twain

An end is in sight to the severe weather shortage. - Ian Macaskill

In skating over thin ice our safety is in our speed. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Was the ground cold when you crawled out this morning? - Henny Youngman

We are cold to others only when we are dull in ourselves. - William Hazlitt

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it. - Joan Rivers

There is no friend like a sister, in calm or stormy weather. - Christina Rossetti

I don't jog. It makes the ice jump right out of my glass. - David Lee Roth

I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass. - David Lee Roth

It is best to read the weather forecasts before we pray for rain. - Mark Twain

She walked across the ballroom as if she were trudging through deep snow. - Noel Coward

Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine. - Anthony J. D'Angelo

It is only in sorrow bad weather masters us; in joy we face the storm and defy it. - Amelia Barr

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

Hockey: 1. Mayhem on ice; 2. A form of disorderly conduct in which the score is kept. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

Growing up, I'd just be at home, playing tennis, spending my allowance on an ice-cream truck. - Venus Williams

Just 'cause there's snow in the basement don't mean there ain't no fire in the roof! - Archie Bunker

I believe Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was... a large Arctic region covered with ice. - Robin Williams

Wrestlers are a little more dedicated than, and are different from, the other people, which may be strange. - Dan Gable

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold. - Ogden Nash

The Eskimos had fifty-two names for snow because it was important to them: there ought to be as many for love. - Margaret Atwood

Courage is not the towering oak that sees storms come and go; it is the fragile blossom that opens in the snow. - Alice M Swaim

When I was in boy scouts, I slipped on the ice and hurt my ankle. A little old lady had to help me across the street. - Steven Wright

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

When you're stressed, eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets. Why? Because stressed spelled backwards is desserts. - Unknown

Aarfy was a dedicated fraternity man who loved cheerleading and class reunions and did not have brains enough to be afraid... - Joseph Heller

They invented the three-day bank holiday weekend because you can't lump all the bad weather into just Saturday and Sunday. - Unknown

Life is no different than the weather. Not only is it unpredictable, but it shows us a new perspective of the world every day. - Suzy Kassem

The hope of a secure and livable world lies with disciplined nonconformists who are dedicated to justice, peace and brotherhood. - Martin Luther King Jr.

Don't knock the weather. Nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while. - Kin Hubbard

In those days the best painkiller was ice. It wasn't addictive, and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it. - George Burns

Passover and Easter are the only Jewish and Christian holidays that move in sync, like the ice skating pairs we saw during the winter Olympics. - Marvin Olasky


Ikea Blueprint

Flight of the Ladybug

Nerve Twitch

Yellowstone Bears

Kayak Funeral

Dutch Bike

Breadlace

Sled Dog

Hog Hunter

Magic Puppies

Log Sticks

Tree Face

Camper Tank

Shipley Donut Pants

Distressing Artwork

Child's Motorcycle Helmet

Montana Mountain Bike

Sealtastic

Bland Entrance

Cruising Advice

Cat Dugout

Open Drive Through

Secret Revealed

Tired Flagpole