A Dog's Worst Nightmare

Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman - Christopher Walken

Sleeping dogs bark the loudest. - Archie Bunker

Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid

A young doctor makes a humpy graveyard. - English Proverb

My little dog - a heartbeat at my feet. - Edith Wharton

No medicine cures what happiness cannot. - Gabriel G Marquez

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

The tongue is the worst part of a bad servant. - Juvenal

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Medicine is a science of uncertainty and an art of probability. - William Osler

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbey

The Cat. He walked by himself, and all places were alike to him. - Rudyard Kipling

That's your best friend and your worst enemy - your own brain. - Fred Durst

My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes

There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats. - Albert Schweitzer

A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker

To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way. - Mark Twain

This is a sharp medicine, but it is a physician for all diseases and miseries. - Sir Walter Raleigh

I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up. - Rodney Dangerfield

I am obsessed with Costco. I love the salmon and rotisserie chicken, the dog beds. - Kris Jenner

The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it. - Doug Larson

Physiology is the stepchild of medicine. That is why Cinderella often turns out the queen. - Martin H. Fischer

The practice of medicine occurs even in primitive society, but law accompanies civilization. - Saying

At his best, man is the noblest of all animals; separated from law and justice he is the worst. - Aristotle

This is the precept by which I have lived: Prepare for the worst; expect the best; and take what comes. - Hannah Arendt

I'm suspicious of people who don't like dogs, but I trust a dog when it doesn't like a person. - Unknown

It is impossible to go through life without trust: that is to be imprisoned in the worst cell of all, oneself. - Graham Greene

If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is certain dogs I know will go to heaven, and very, very few people. - James Thurber

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

Tolerance is the worst roar of all, including tolerance for homosexuals, feminists, and religions that don't follow Christ. - Josh McDowell

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

The trout enjoys the river,
The whale enjoys the sea,
And dogs love most an old lamp-post,
But you're my cup of tea. - W H Auden

When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller

Even if you can be the world's best at one thing, you'll be the world's worst at something else. Supermodels make pathetic sumo wrestlers. - Martha Beck