Women's Outhouse

Dull women have immaculate homes. - Unknown

The woman that deliberates is lost. - Joseph Addison

Women in London must have learned not to breathe. - Irene Trimble

Women want love to be a novel. Men, a short story. - Daphne du Maurier

Women like silent men. They think they're listening. - Marcel Achard

Temptation is a woman's weapon and man's excuse. - H L Mencken

This is a feminist bookstore. There is no humour section. - John Callahan

Women and foxes, being weak, are distinguished by superior tact. - Ambrose Bierce

Love is what happens to men and women who don’t know each other. - W Somerset Maugham

I am a woman meant for a man, but I never found a man who could compete. - Bette Davis

Joy Of Motherhood: What a woman experiences when all the kids are in bed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Back then the women had babies, which they called in them days, begatten. - Archie Bunker

If women can be railroad workers in Russia, why can't they fly in space? - Valentina Tereshkova

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction. - Oscar Wilde

My vigour, vitality, and cheek repel me. I am the kind of woman I would run from. - Nancy Astor

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men and women are created equal. - Elizabeth Cady Stanton

And what is better than wisdom? Woman. And what is better than a good woman? Nothing. - Geoffrey Chaucer

I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck. - WC Fields

A man who moralizes is usually a hypocrite, and a woman who moralizes is usually plain. - Oscar Wilde

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Hiring someone to write your autobiography is like hiring someone to take a bath for you. - Mae West

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. - Robert Frost

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him. - Cher

The age of a woman doesn't mean a thing. The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Field hockey is my strongest sport, and if I lose a game, I take a long, hot bath and moan about it. - Emma Watson

I would venture to guess that Anon, who wrote so many poems without signing them, was often a woman. - Virginia Woolf

Some old women and men grow bitter with age. The more their teeth drop out, the more biting they get. - George D. Prentice

A woman should cleave into her husband. Right here in this house is where Edith's cleavage belongs. - Archie Bunker

When I invite a woman to dinner I expect her to look at my face.
That's the price she has to pay. - Groucho Marx

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public. - Phyllis Diller

No man succeeds without a good woman behind him. Wife or mother, if it is both, he is twice blessed indeed. - Godfrey Winn

Sometimes a man just can't satisfy all of a woman's desires. Which is why God invented dental floss. - Unknown

There goes a woman who knows all the things that can be taught and none of the things that cannot be taught. - Coco Chanel

For twenty-four years I've been in love with the same woman. If my wife ever finds out, she'll kill me. - Henny Youngman

I like the West. That's where men are men and women are women, and it's hard to beat a combination like that. - Milton Berle

Time and trouble will tame an advanced young woman, but an advanced old woman is uncontrollable by any earthly force. - Dorothy L Sayers

Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom. - Jerry Seinfeld

I love writing for women. The willingness to go from laughter to tears in a moment is the greatest palette you can paint with as a writer. - Michael P King

Like many other women, I could not understand why every man who changed a diaper has felt impelled, in recent years, to write a book about it. - Barbara Ehrenreich