We're Off to See the Wizard!
Presidential aid from the Wizard Of Oz
Four United States Presidents get caught up in a tornado and off they whirled to the land of OZ. They finally made it to the Emerald City and went to find the Great Wizard...
'What brings the 4 of you before the great Wizard of Oz?'
Jimmy Carter stepped forward timidly and said, 'I've come for some courage.'
'No Problem! said the Wizard. Who’s next?' Richard Nixon stepped forward. 'Well, I think I need a heart.'
'Done! says the Wizard. Who comes next before the Great and Powerful Oz?' Up stepped Dubya and said, 'I’m told by the American people that I need a brain.'
'No problem! said the Wizard. Consider it done.' Then there is a great silence in the hall. Bill Clinton is just standing there, looking around... 'Is Dorothy here?'
All politics is local. - Thomas P O'Neil
All politics is applesauce. - Will Rogers
Politics makes strange red-fellows. - Will Rogers
Politics is the art of the possible. - Otto von Bismarck
Politics is just show business for ugly people. - Jay Leno
A government of law is a government of lawyers. - Saying
The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun. - R Buckminster Fuller
The problem with political jokes is they get elected. - Henry Cate, VII
If men were angels, no government would be necessary. - James Madison
There can be no wise politics without thought beforehand. - Annie Besant
Honor is not the exclusive property of any political party. - Herbert Hoover
We live in a world in which politics has replaced philosophy. - Martin L. Gross
You can't get rich in politics unless you're a crook. - Harry S Truman
A society of sheep must in time beget a government of wolves. - Bertrand de Jouvenel
An honest man in politics shines more than he would elsewhere. - Mark Twain
I believe that truth is the glue that holds government together. - Gerald R. Ford
I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat. - Will Rogers
I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent. - Edith Sitwell
Politics is the chloroform of the Irish people, or, rather the hashish. - Oliver St. John Gogarty
My sheer existence is like a political act to a lot of people. It's not to me. - Grimes
Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated. - Will Rogers
Personally, I'm against political jokes. Too often they get elected to office. - Henny Youngman
Idealism is the noble toga that political gentlemen drape over their will to power. - Aldous Huxley
Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business. - Tom Robbins
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke
In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. - Margaret Thatcher
My brother Bob doesn't want to be in government - he promised Dad he'd go straight. - John F Kennedy
There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you. - Will Rogers
Good thing we've still got politics in Texas - finest form of free entertainment ever invented. - Molly Ivins
Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown
Politics, for years, or all too long, has been concerned with right or left instead of right or wrong. - Richard Armour
When governments become large, voters cannot exercise close oversight, otherwise known as political power. - Maggie Gallagher
At present, our country needs women's idealism and determination, perhaps more in politics than anywhere else. - Shirley Chisholm
Only government can take perfectly good paper, cover it with perfectly good ink and make the combination worthless. - Milton Friedman
In politics it is necessary either to betray one's country or the electorate. I prefer to betray the electorate. - Charles de Gaulle
One of the reasons people hate politics is that truth is rarely a politician's objective. Election and power are. - Cal Thomas
If the government was as afraid of disturbing the consumer as it is of disturbing business, this would be some democracy. - Kin Hubbard
Every country must be absolutely free to adopt the type of economic, political and social system that it considers convenient. - Fidel Castro
The workers' and peasants' government proposes to all warring peoples... negotiations leading to a just, democratic peace. - Lenin
Our ancestors believed in magic, prayers, trickery, browbeating and bullying. I think it would be fair to sum that up as 'Irish politics'. - Flann O'Brien