Toddler Joe

The computer is a moron. - Peter F Drucker

Computer viruses should count as life. - Stephen Hawking

Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. - Candice Bergen

You can't write poetry on the computer. - Quentin Tarantino

Oh, so they have internet on computers now! - Homer Simpson

We don't need nukes. We have the internet. - Alice Minium

The internet is a great way to get on the net. - Bob Dole

I took the initiative in creating the internet. - Al Gore

Immunity to boredom gives the computer an edge. - Alan Lakein

Computer logic is no substitute for human wisdom. - Unknown

Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance. - King George V

Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all. - John F Kennedy

I write poems like some people sing in the bathroom. - Amit Bhatia

Ecrastinate: Checking your e-mail just one more time - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The e-mail of the species is more deadly than the mail. - Stephen Fry

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel. - Billy Wilder

Sleep is so cute when it tries to compete with the internet. - Will Ferrell

The Internet is a telephone system that's gotten uppity. - Clifford Stoll

Iconomic: Making do with fewer icons on your computer desktop - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

For business, our Internet love affair was a gift from the gods. - Gary Vaynerchuk

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. - Paul Ehrlich

Checkpoint: A location from which the programmer draws his salary. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

My honeymoon night was spent on the floor in the bathroom with my mother. - Ronnie Spector

Valentine's day without your love is like a year without the Internet. - Santosh Kalwar

I started singing in the bathroom. Nothing was coming out. It was ghastly. - Rod Stewart

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. - Emo Philips

Getting information off the Internet is like taking a drink from a fire hydrant. - Mitchell Kapor

There are two things that Jack Bauer never does. Show mercy, and go to the bathroom. - Kiefer Sutherland

Keyboard Plaque: The disgusting buildup of dirt and crud found on computer keyboards - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Keyboard: 1. Place to hang your keys; 2. The standard way to generate computer errors. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

At Disneyland, you never go 'backstage' - even when you're in the bathroom. - Hideo Kojima

Internet: The best library in the world, but with all its books strewn across the floor - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom. - Bob Hope

I don't believe in e-mail. I'm an old-fashioned girl. I prefer calling and hanging up. - Sarah Jessica Parker

No matter what, the very first piece of social media real estate I'd start with is a blog. - Chris Brogan

With every bathroom renovation, there are three areas that I focus on: budget, function and style. - Candice Olson

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

Learning by doing, peer-to-peer teaching, and computer simulation are all part of the same equation. - Nicholas Negroponte

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public. - Douglas Coupland

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

The Internet is so big, so powerful and pointless that for some people it is a complete substitute for life. - Andrew Brown

I use a computer. I don't know if that qualifies me as a techie, but I'm pretty good on the computer. - Leonard Nimoy

The Internet has turned what used to be a controlled, one-way message into a real-time dialogue with millions. - Danielle Sacks

They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. - Milton Berle

Word-of-mouth marketing has always been important. Today, it's more important than ever because of the Internet. - Newt Barrett

People enjoy the interaction on the internet, and the feeling of belonging to a group that does something interesting. - Linus Torvalds

The new information technology (Internet and e-mail) have practically eliminated the physical costs of communications. - Peter F Drucker

The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. - Arthur C. Clarke

The protean nature of the computer is such that it can act like a machine or like a language to be shaped and exploited. - Alan Kay

Until Facebook came along, there was hardly anywhere on the public Internet where you had to operate with your real name. - David Kirkpatrick

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are. - Will Ferrell

My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them. - Penn Jillette

Just think how far we've come in the 20th Century. The man who used to be a cog in the wheel is now a digit in the computer. - Robert Fuoss

The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting. - Dave Barry

I wish I had a nickel for every song that I've left in the bathroom, written down on a matchbox, or just totally forgotten about. - Tommy Shaw

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in. - Rita Rudner

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

The majority of people who don't have Internet don't have the Internet because they don't know why they want to use the Internet. - Mark Zuckerberg

Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose. - Andy Rooney

I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included. - Steven Wright

The problem with the internet is that it gives you everything - reliable material and crazy material. So the problem becomes, how do you discriminate? - Umberto Eco