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The Good Wife's Guide

An Extract from a 13 May 1955 'Housekeeping Monthly' Article

The Good Wife's Guide thanks to Cherei McCarter

- Have dinner ready, Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.

- Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you’ll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.

- Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.

- Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before
your husband arrives.

- Gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper etc. and then run a dustcloth over the tables.

- Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.

- Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children’s hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair and, if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part. Minimise all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.

- Be happy to see him.

- Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.

- Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.

- Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax.

- Your goal: Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquility where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.

- Don’t greet him with complaints and problems.

- Don’t complain if he’s late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.

- Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.

- Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.

- Don’t ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness.
You have no right to question him.

- A good wife always knows her place.

QuotaBills
Take my wife - please! - Henny Youngman

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. - Groucho Marx

Love - a temporary insanity curable by marriage. - Ambrose Bierce

If you wish to grow thinner, diminish your dinner. - H.S. Leigh

Success occurs when opportunity meets preparation. - Zig Ziglar

To my embarrassment, I was born in bed with a lady. - Wilson Mizner

Luck is a matter of preparation meeting opportunity. - Oprah Winfrey

This is a feminist bookstore. There is no humour section. - John Callahan

The best preparation for tomorrow is doing your best today. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

We're eating dinner soon. Don't fill up on homework. - Alex Baze

Behind every successful man is a woman. Behind her is his wife. - Groucho Marx

A man's mother is his misfortune, but his wife is his fault. - Walter Begehot

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. - Ogden Nash

Music with dinner is an insult both to the cook and the violinist. - G K Chesterton

I'm having trouble managing the mansion. What I need is a wife. - Ella Grasso

There's one thing about a late marriage - it doesn't last long. - Unknown

My wife tells me that if I ever decide to leave, she's coming with me. - Jon Bon Jovi

The best preparation for tomorrow is to do today's work superbly well. - William Osler

A strong positive self-image is the best possible preparation for success. - Joyce Brothers

Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! - Homer Simpson

A son is a son till he takes him a wife, a daughter is a daughter all of her life. - Unknown

Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases. - Milton Berle

I have often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming. - Jimmy Carter

If ever two were one, then surely we.
If ever man were loved by wife, then thee. - Anne Bradstreet

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. - Jimmy Durante

We seldom give each other advice - I think that's the success of 25 years of marriage. - Laura Bush

In life, it's not who you know that's important, it's how your wife found out. - Joey Adams

Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

My husband always felt that a marriage and career don't mix. That's why he's never worked. - Phyllis Diller

The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid. - Jane Austen

Ladies, if a man says he will fix it, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it. - Unknown

I had a feeling once about mathematics – that I saw it all... but it was after dinner and I let it go. - Winston Churchill

Marge, I'm going to miss you so much. And it's not just the sex. It's also the food preparation. - Homer Simpson

Poverty is an anomaly to rich people. It is very difficult to make out why people who want dinner do not ring the bell. - Walter Bagehot

It is very vulgar to talk about one's business. Only people like stockbrokers do that, and then merely at dinner parties. - Oscar Wilde

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash

I'm Irish, so I'm used to odd stews. I can take it. Just throw a lot of carrots and onions in there and I'll call it dinner. - Liam Neeson

My wife was a make-up artist, and she's a total product junkie. Our bathroom is packed full of lotions and potions so I end up trying them out. - Robert Carlyle

This is a honeydew day. That is when you get a day off and the wife says, "Honey, do this," and "Honey, do that" around the house. - Jim Lemon


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