Swiss Minigun

Leave the gun, take the cannoli. - The Godfather

Never shoot more than you can eat. - Unknown

The gun is not out of Irish politics. - Ian Paisley

A gun gives you the body, not the bird. - Henry David Thoreau

If you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer? - Steven Wright

Rotarians, be patriotic! Learn to shoot yourself. - Unknown

Please do not shoot the pianist. He is doing his best. - Oscar Wilde

Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. - George Burns

Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality. - Jules de Gaultier

A Canadian is sort of like an American, but without the gun. - Unknown

I am proud of the fact that I never invented weapons to kill. - Thomas Edison

Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them? - George Carlin

The perils of duck hunting are great - especially for the duck. - Walter Cronkite

Prose is a museum, where all the old weapons of poetry are kept. - T.E. Hulme

You can figure out what the villain fears by his choice of weapons. - Connie Brockway

Guns don't kill people. Dads with pretty daughters kill people. - Unknown

I eat swiss cheese. But I only nibble on it. I make the holes bigger. - Steven Wright

Those who hammer their guns into plows will plow for those who do not. - Thomas Jefferson

Golf is a game in which you yell fore, shoot six, and write down five. - Paul Harvey

A lawyer with his briefcase can steal more than a hundred men with guns. - Mario Puzo

If you have a gun you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank you can rob everyone. - Unknown

Grandchildren are God's rewards to grandparents for not shooting their children. - Unknown

A world without nuclear weapons would be less stable and more dangerous for all of us. - Margaret Thatcher

When I take a gun in hand, the safest place for a pheasant is just opposite the muzzle. - Sydney Smith

A gun is not a weapon, it’s a tool, like a hammer or a screwdriver or an alligator. - Homer Simpson

Attitude is everything - shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll be among the stars. - Les Brown

Education is a weapon whose effects depend on who holds it in his hands and at whom it is aimed. - Joseph Stalin

The difference between a gun and a tree is a difference of tempo. The tree explodes every spring. - Ezra Pound

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank. - Woody Allen

A moose is an animal with horns on the front of its head and a hunting lodge wall on the back of it. - Groucho Marx

A critic is someone who never actually goes to the battle, yet who afterwards comes out shooting the wounded. - Tyne Daly

I became hooked on the idea of being able to shoot an image and process it myself, and end up with a product. - Leonard Nimoy

No weapon has ever settled a moral problem. It can impose a solution but it cannot guarantee it to be a just one. - Ernest Hemingway

I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones. - Albert Einstein

Humour is the weapon of unarmed people: it helps people who are oppressed to smile at the situation that pains them. - Simon Wiesenthal

The only weapon with which the unconscious patient can immediately retaliate upon the incompetent surgeon is hemorrhage. - William Stewart Halsted

The Supreme Court's only armor is the cloak of public trust; its sole ammunition, the collective hopes of our society. - Irving R. Kaufman

I come bearing an olive branch in one hand, and the freedom fighter's gun in the other. Do not let the olive branch fall from my hand. - Yasser Arafat

When I came back to Dublin, I was courtmartialled in my absence and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence. - Brendan Behan

Sex is like an atom bomb. A potent weapon which fascinates and frightens. We're afraid to let it loose, yet we all have our finger on the button. - Zeena Schreck