Special Present For Grandpa

Water rusts pipes. - WC Fields

Save water - drink vodka. - Unknown

Kettle Drum: What musicians boil water in - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A tear is made of 1% water and 99% feelings. - Unknown

The conscious water saw its Master and blushed. - Alexander Pope

If there is magic on this planet, it is contained in water. - Loren Eiseley

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. - Mitch Hedberg

Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life. - Daniel F E Auber

I moved to Florida because you don't have to shovel water. - James Randi

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. - English Proverb

You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West

Don't think there are no crocodiles because the water is calm. - Malayan Proverb

Don't let aging get you down. It's too hard to get back up. - John Wagner

Hydroponic Gardening: Using a plant to convert water into yard work - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I bought some powdered water, but I don't know what to add to it. - Steven Wright

Forget aging. If you're six feet above ground, it's a good day. - Faith Hill

Gardening requires lots of water, most of it in the form of perspiration. - Lou Erickson

You don't drown by falling into water. You only drown if you stay there. - Zig Ziglar

Don't be a fish; be a frog. Swim in the water and jump when you hit ground. - Kim Young-ha

Warm Water Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Don't throw away the old bucket until you know whether the new one holds water. - Swedish Proverb

Puddle: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Mirror: A truthful reflector shunned by vampires, hypocrites and aging fashion models - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Aging is the extraordinary process where you become the person you always should have been. - David Bowie

You can lead audiences to a half-dressed, aging pop star but you can't make them watch. - Megan Basham

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

Most whale photos you see show whales in this beautiful blue water - it's almost like space. - Brian Skerry

A wise man adapts himself to circumstances, as water shapes itself to the vessel that contains it. - Chinese Proverb

The elderly don't drive that badly; they're just the only ones with time to do the speed limit. - Jason Love

Going without food or water will kill the body, but the lack of relationship will kill the minds and spirit. - David Jeremiah

I'm grateful that I never was that senior athlete who realized she'd done nothing but train all her life. - Clara Hughes

Gold and diamonds are nice, but clean, crisp, controlled water has long been the preeminent hallmark of the rich. - Anthony Doerr

I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process. It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance? - Unknown

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

After all, when a stone is dropped into a pond, the water continues quivering even after the stone has sunk to the bottom. - Arthur Golden

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

From a drop of water a logician could infer the possibility of an Atlantic or a Niagara without having seen or heard of one or the other. - Arthur Conan Doyle

Advice from a tree:
- Stand tall and proud
- Go out on a limb
- Remember your roots
- Drink plenty of water
- Enjoy the view - Unknown