#1 humor site on the 'net

Redneck House Cleaning

Now Bubba digs housework!

Redneck House Cleaning thanks to Bob Tasse

QuotaBills
An old man in a house is a good sign. - Benjamin Franklin

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

A road to a friend's house is never long. - Danish Proverb

There will be no whitewash at the White House. - Richard M Nixon

There are no elevators in the house of success. - H.H. Vreeland

The words you speak become the house you live in. - Hafiz

It is easier to demolish a house than to build one. - Irish proverb

Peace and a well-built house cannot be bought too dearly. - Danish Proverb

Stucco: What a lot of house hunters are getting these days - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

He taught me housekeeping; when I divorce I keep the house. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

I can't clean house and save the world at the same time. - Unknown

Give a landlord an inch and he'll build an apartment house. - American Proverb

Don't talk about a rope in the house of someone whose father was hung. - Colin Farrell

Census Taker: A man who goes from house to house increasing the population. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I bought a house on a one-way dead-end road. I don't know how I got there. - Steven Wright

My friend Sam has one leg. I went to his house. I couldn't go up the stairs. - Steven Wright

Architect: One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money. - Ambrose Bierce

What is the use of a house if you haven’t got a tolerable planet to put it on? - Henry David Thoreau

I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. - Steven Wright

If we build in the desert, let the house know the desert and the desert be proud of the house. - Frank Lloyd Wright

Crafting fills my life, and my closets, and my drawers, and every empty tote bag in the house. - Unknown

It's not my fault I was dragged out of my house by a mob and forced to predict the weather. - Punxsutawney Phil

In my house on the ceilings I have paintings of the rooms above, so I never have to go upstairs. - Steven Wright

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

No guest is so welcome in a friend's house that he will not become a nuisance after three days. - Plautus

You need a plan to build a house. To build a life, it is even more important to have a plan or goal. - Zig Ziglar

A woman should cleave into her husband. Right here in this house is where Edith's cleavage belongs. - Archie Bunker

Window Screen: 1. A device to prevent the escape of insects; 2. A device for keeping flies in the house. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

All the plants in my house are dead - I shot them last night. I was teasing them by watering them with ice cubes. - Steven Wright

When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you. - Nora Ephron

A squirrel dying in front of your house may be more relevant to your interests right now than people dying in Africa. - Mark Zuckerberg

Eden is that old-fashioned house
We dwell in every day
Without suspecting our abode
Until we drive away. - Emily Dickinson

Having children is like living in a frat house - nobody sleeps, everything's broken and there's a lot of throwing up. - Ray Romano

My friend Sally is a nudist. I went to her house. The closets have no doors. The walls are covered with see-through wallpaper. - Steven Wright

Hockey on roller skates is like MMA in a bounce house: the elements are there, but the medium makes the whole thing ridiculous. - David Walton

One need not be a chamber to be haunted;
One need not be a house;
The brain has corridors surpassing
Material place. - Emily Dickinson

The worst thing about work in the house or home is that whatever you do it is destroyed, laid waste or eaten within twenty-four hours. - Lady Hasluck

If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door, greet him with, "Who could have done this? We have no enemies." - Phyllis Diller

Science is built of facts the way a house is built of bricks; but an accumulation of facts is no more science than a pile of bricks is a house. - Henri Poincare

Charity is a very personal equation, like we say charity begins at home. It starts with your immediate help in the house: the people who work for you. - Malaika A. Khan


Puzzle Ad

Winter Driving in Canada

2022 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Coffee Morning

Slide-n-Freeze

Slip Sliding Away

Canadian Smart Car

Winter SOS

East Coast Winter Graffiti

Handstand Snowman

We're Not Gonna Take It

Vinyl Richie

Karma Towing

Red Wine Diet

Snow Geese

Family Birthday Reminder

The Circular File

Pair Tree

'Top Down' Snow Removal

Winter Kayaking

Mustache Breeze

Something Positive

Snowstorm Closure

Cold Cross Bunny