Good Advice

Men are from Mars, women are from Venus. - John Gray

Americans like fat books and thin women. - Russell Baker

Man has his will, but woman has her way. - Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.

Women are made to be loved, not understood. - Oscar Wilde

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a net. - Cynthia Heimel

A man's only as old as the woman he feels. - Groucho Marx

Never trust the advice of a man in difficulties. - Aesop

Women in London must have learned not to breathe. - Irene Trimble

Women want love to be a novel. Men, a short story. - Daphne du Maurier

Taking joy in life is a woman's best cosmetic. - Rosalind Russell

A good scare is worth more to a man than good advice. - Edgar Watson Howe

I've been told I'm a role model to many women. - Donald Trump

Women would not be prostitutes if it were not for men. - Baroness Vickers

Of course I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice. - Unknown

I love bringing roses to a woman when she least expects it. - Esai Morales

A woman is attractive when she is somebody else's wife. - African Proverb

Why do men like intelligent women? Because opposites attract. - Kathy Lette

I've never struck a woman in my life, not even my own mother. - WC Fields

She's loaded with this, waddya call, women's intermission. - Archie Bunker

I don't trust a bank that would lend money to such a poor risk. - Robert Benchley

Women should not have children after 35. Really? 35 children is enough. - Bill Murray

I am a woman meant for a man, but I never found a man who could compete. - Bette Davis

It is sometimes as dangerous to be run into by a microbe as by a trolley car. - J.J. Walsh

In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

If you think women are the weaker sex, try pulling the blanket back to your side. - Stuart Turner

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen

Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed. - Oscar Wilde

He is bad that will not take advice, but he is a thousand times worse that takes every advice. - Unknown

By the time a woman realizes her mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks she's wrong. - Unknown

Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd,
Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorned. - William Congreve

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?" - Dumas

A woman's dress should be like a barbed-wire fence: serving its purpose without obstructing the view. - Sophia Loren

Poverty: 1. A state of mind sometimes induced by a neighbour's new car; 2. One thing that money can't buy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Have a place for everything and keep the thing somewhere else; this is not a piece of advice, it is merely a custom. - Mark Twain

Except for a few guitar chords, everything I've learned in my life that is of any value I've learned from women. - Glenn Frey

I think the only difference between me and the other candidates is that I'm more honest and my women are more beautiful. - Donald Trump

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

My advice to you is not to inquire why or whither, but just enjoy your ice cream while it's on your plate - that's my philosophy. - Thornton Wilder