#1 humor site on the 'net

Family Bike

Cheap transportation for your whole family - try out this loaded bike!

Family Bike thanks to Dave Loewen

Family Bike thanks to Dave Loewen

QuotaBills
By ancestry, I was born to rule. - Nelson Mandela

Ancestry is a hereditary condition. - Unknown

My family tree could use some pruning. - Unknown

You live as long as you are remembered. - Russian Proverb

A thankful heart is the parent of all virtues. - Cicero

Grandmas are short on criticism and long on love. - Unknown

There is no place like home - except Grandma's. - Unknown

Sticking with your family is what makes it a family. - Mitch Albom

He that troubleth his own house shall inherit the wind. - The Bible

I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage. - Erma Bombeck

Do not remove the ancient landmark that your ancestors set up. - Bible

Wrinkles are hereditary. Parents get them from their children. - Doris Day

Writing is conscience, scruple, and the farming of our ancestors. - Edward Dahlberg

The meek may inherit the earth, but they don't get in to Harvard. - Robin Williams

Misers aren't fun to live with, but they make wonderful ancestors. - Unknown

I write to keep in contact with our ancestors and to spread truth to people. - Sonia Sanchez

Have children while your parents are still young enough to take care of them. - Rita Rudner

As a child, my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it. - Buddy Hackett

To an adolescent, there is nothing in the world more embarrassing than a parent. - Dave Barry

Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents' shortcomings. - Laurence J Peter

The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children. - Clarence Darrow

There's no road map on how to raise a family: it's always an enormous negotiation. - Meryl Streep

I only hope when I have my own family that every day I see a little more of my father in me. - Keith Urban

We are the children of many sires, and every drop of blood in us in its turn ... betrays its ancestor. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Parents should leave books lying around marked "forbidden" if they want their children to read. - Doris Lessing

Every family story has 1,000 other stories contained within it, like an unending series of nesting dolls. - Alison Pick

Any living cell carries within it the experiences of a billion years of experimentation by its ancestors. - Max Delbrook

If a child, a spouse, a life partner, or a parent depends on you and your income, you need life insurance. - Suze Orman

All dentists talk while they work. They have inherited this from their professional ancestors, the barbers. - Mark Twain

My parents live in a retirement community, which is basically a minimum-security prison with a golf course. - Joel Warshaw

Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years. - George Burns

There is no king who has not had a slave among his ancestors, and no slave who has not had a king among his. - Helen Keller

Children begin by loving their parents; after a time they judge them; rarely, if ever, do they forgive them. - Oscar Wilde

In 1953 there were two ways for an Irish Catholic boy to impress his parents: become a priest or attend Notre Dame. - Phil Donahue

Her capacity for family affection is extraordinary: when her third husband died, her hair turned quite gold from grief. - Oscar Wilde

As a family we couldn't decide whether to have Grandma buried or cremated, so in the end we decided to let her live. - Gary Delaney

I pray for forgiveness. For help and guidance. To be a better person. For the health of my family. For the world to be a better place. - Tyson Fury

The family should be a place where each new human being can have an early atmosphere conducive to the development of constructive creativity. - Edith Schaeffer

With the steady disintegration of the family in modern society over the last century, the role of the school in bridging the gap has become vital. - Stephen Covey

I have frequently been questioned, especially by women, of how I could reconcile family life with a scientific career. Well, it has not been easy. - Marie Curie


Venice on a Shoestring Budget

New Truck Key

Spiderman's Car

Knife Throwing Act

Another Day In Traffic

Australian Cyclist

Garden Gnome

Mute Button

Pardon My French

Irish Pothole

Yoga Pants

Baby Illusion

Mother Wrench's Gripping Story

Sechelt Sunrays

Russian BiteLifter

Propane Diving

Scuba Diving Sucks

Louisiana Turtle Dogs

Special Offer

Parking Squeeze

Music Note Chairlift

Gangsta

Reformed Buddhists

Redneck Mirror