#1 humor site on the 'net

Car of the Future

High-mileage pedal-power car of tomorrow with eco-friendly backup

Car of the Future thanks to Darwin McKee

QuotaBills
I touch the future. I teach. - Christa McAuliffe

The future of business is social. - Barry Libert

Inspiration is remembering the future. - Unknown

The bridge to the future in the phallus. - D.H. Lawrence

The future has a way of arriving unannounced. - George F Will

Life is a series of collisions with the future. - Jose Ortega Y Gasset

The dead are merely the countrymen of my future. - Dean Koontz

The future is hidden even from those who make it. - Anatole France

The future is made of the same stuff as the present. - Simone Weil

The future belongs to those who prepare for it today. - Malcolm X

Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines. - David Letterman

The world of the future is in our making. Tomorrow is now. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Stress should be a powerful driving force, not an obstacle. - Bob Phillips

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Where there is no future before a people, there is no hope. - Edward Wilmot Blyden

Do something today that your future self will thank you for. - Unknown

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Children are one third of our population and all of our future. - Unknown

The best leaders not only develop us, they advocate our future. - Michael Dooley

Destiny is a Paris driver pushing a taxicab with my name on it. - Frank Dane

Taxi Driver: Worker who earns a living by driving customers away - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Republicans are men of narrow vision, who are afraid of the future. - Jimmy Carter

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

The only thing we know about the future is that it will be different. - Peter F Drucker

Our faith in the present dies out long before our faith in the future. - Ruth Benedict

You don't just stumble into the future. You create your own future. - Roger Smith

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic. - Dan Rather

The future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep! - Unknown

You ain't going nowhere, son. You ought to go back to driving a truck. - Jim Denny

Hold on to a ray of hope, and a promise of future... and follow your dreams. - Unknown

A careful driver is one who honks his horn when he goes through a red light. - Henry Morgan

We yearned for the future. How did we learn it, that talent for insatiability? - Margaret Atwood

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

Lying makes a problem part of the future; truth makes a problem part of the past. - Rick Pitino

Descartes commanded the future from his study more than Napoleon from the throne. - Oliver Holmes

How you see your future is much more important than what has happened in the past. - Zig Ziglar

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

Sometimes when you look in his eyes you get the feeling that someone else is driving. - David Letterman

I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield

I object to people running down the future. I intend to live the rest of my life there. - Charles F Kettering

The best way to secure future happiness is to be as happy as is rightfully possible today. - Charles W. Eliot

Golden Age: When the kids are too old to need baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

Look closely at the present you are constructing. It should look like the future you are dreaming. - Unknown

Cease to inquire what the future has in store, and to take as a gift whatever the day brings forth. - Horace

The real happiness of life is to enjoy the present, without any anxious dependence upon the future. - Lucius A Seneca

If I weren't skateboarding, I'd love to race cars. I like anything that's fast and active. - Ryan Sheckler

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

Our children may learn about heroes of the past. Our task is to make ourselves architects of the future. - Jomo Mzee Kenyatta

Change is the law of life. And those who look only to the past or present are certain to miss the future. - John F Kennedy

It's much easier to double your business by doubling your conversion rate than doubling your traffic. - Bryan Eisenberg

The irony of the matter is that the future generations do not have a vote. In effect, we hold their proxy. - Charles J Hitch

Poverty: 1. A state of mind sometimes induced by a neighbour's new car; 2. One thing that money can't buy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? - George Carlin

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

To believe in something not yet proved and to underwrite it with our lives; it is the only way we can leave the future open. - Lillian Smith

To make no mistake is not in the power of man; but from their errors and mistakes the wise and good learn wisdom for the future. - Plutarch

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

Don't let the age on your driver's license determine your season in life. Everyone's growing seasons look a bit different. - Vicki Kuyper

Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present. - Marcus Aurelius

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright


Urleen

Carry On or Carrion?

Selfie Pilot

Monarch Butterflies - Starting a Monarchy

Air Couch

Europe Road Trip

Thongthing Special

Nighttime Graffiti

Baby Formula

Kid Suction

Redneck Moving Truck

Critter Control

Lost Dog

Nail Chair

Looking For Something?

Yellow Pet

Race Break

Fuse Bypass

Good Boy

British Tea Party

Roadside Assistance

Chair Boy

Cheers Beer

African Airstrip