#1 humor site on the 'net

Bad Day Flyer

When a soft landing can lead to a good meal

Bad Day Flyer thanks to Darwin McKee

QuotaBills
I got bigger fish to fly - Archie Bunker

Owning a drone does not a pilot make. - Alex Morritt

Rise and rise again until lambs become lions. - Robin Hood

Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible. - Lord Kelvin

Mothers are angels that lift us when we cannot fly. - Unknown

When spiderwebs unite, they can halt even the lion. - African Proverb

Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly. - G K Chesterton

Luck is like having a rice dumpling fly into your mouth. - Japanese Proverb

The lion is ashamed, it's true, when he hunts with the fox. - Gotthold E. Lessing

The sky is the limit only for those who aren't afraid to fly. - Bob Bello

The higher we soar the smaller we appear to those who cannot fly. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

It has yet to be proven that intelligence has any survival value. - Arthur C. Clarke

I think being a dragon would be pretty awesome... you get to fly. - Josh Keaton

It is now possible for a flight attendant to get a pilot pregnant. - Richard J. Ferris

It is better to live one day as a lion, than a thousand days as lamb. - Roman Proverb

Something in the air this morning made me feel like flying... Spring Flight - Eileen Granfors

Thank God men cannot as yet fly and lay waste the sky as well as the earth. - Henry David Thoreau

An army of sheep led by a lion would defeat an army of lions led by a sheep. - Arab Proverb

If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to the airport. - Jonathan Winters

It's OK to have butterflies in your stomach. Just get them to fly in formation. - Rob Gilbert

Now that I've found the way to fly, which direction should I go into the night? - Ally Condie

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep. - Woody Allen

My tent doesn't look like much but it is air-conditioned and has exceptional location. - Fennel Hudson

Therefore, it is necessary to be a fox to discover the snares and a lion to terrify the wolves. - Niccolo Machiavelli

Nothing can move a man who is paid by the hour; how sweet the flight of time seems to his calm mind. - Charles D Warner

Caesar dreamed that he was flying above the clouds, and now that he was clasping the hand of Jupiter. - Suetonius

I don't like all this fresh air: I'm from Los Angeles; I don't trust any air I can't see. - Bob Hope

Music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and life to everything. - Plato

When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it. - Henry Ford

A fly, Sir, may sting a stately horse and make him wince; but, one is but an insect, and the other is a horse still. - Samuel Johnson

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

The tiger, he come up with the tigeress. The lion, he come up with the lionette. The zebra, he come up with the zeberelle. - Archie Bunker

Aim at the sun, and you may not reach it; but your arrow will fly far higher than if aimed at an object on a level with yourself. - Joel Hawes

Live in each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit, and resign yourself to the influences of each. - Henry David Thoreau

If Beethoven had been killed in a plane crash at the age of twenty-two, it would have changed the history of music... and of aviation. - Tom Stoppard

Southwest Airlines is successful because the company understands it's a customer service company. It also happens to be an airline. - Harvey Mackay

Pilots take no special joy in walking: pilots like flying. Pilots generally take pride in a good landing, not in getting out of the vehicle. - Neil Armstrong

A neurotic is a man who builds a castle in the air. A psychotic is the man who lives in it. And a psychiatrist is a man who collects the rent. - Lord Webb-Johnson

A nation that destroys its soils destroys itself. Forests are the lungs of our land, purifying the air and giving fresh strength to our people. - Franklin D Roosevelt

Love is like jumping out of an airplane with no parachute. But there’s no need to be frightened, because that plane is still on the ground. - Jarod Kintz


Canadian Whiskey

Car-Eating Cow

Tea For Two

Paint Pants

Sea Sand Art

Grief Bacon

Respect For Grapes

Up Purriscope

Fresh Chicken

Ice Climbing Building

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Does Your Hedgehog Bite?

Lazy Line Painters

Vegan Brownies

From Start To Finish

Milkshake Diet

Hand Speech

Software Cake

Bland Entrance

Preikestolen Pulpit Rock

Redneck Firemen

Side Rail

Icy Grip Of Winter

Brace For The Resolutioners