#1 humor site on the 'net

Amish Friends

Things couldn't be better back on the homestead

Amish Friends thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
A fat purse never lacks friends. - Unknown

A selfie a day keeps the friends away. - Unknown

Vice-President: A cow's fifth teat. - Harry S Truman

Milk the cow but do not pull off the udder. - Greek Proverb

Friends are God's apology for relatives. - Hugh Kingsmill

All your friends are gonna be green with envious. - Archie Bunker

You can't trust the judgment of good friends. - Carl Sandburg

In the cookie of life, friends are chocolate chips. - Salman Rushdie

I have no friends and no enemies - only competitors. - Aristotle Onassis

Telepathy: Being too lazy to give your friends a call - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies. - Milton Berle

The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away. - Wilson Mizner

You don't have to hold your stomach in for real friends. - Unknown

Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty. - Sicilian Proverb

It's the friends you can call up at 4:00 a.m. that matter. - Marlene Dietrich

God gave us our relatives; thank God we can choose our friends. - Ethel Mumford

He will never have true friends who is afraid of making enemies. - William Hazlitt

Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits

What draws people to be friends is that they see the same truth. They share it. - C S Lewis

Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. - Jesus

Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer. - Ed Cunningham

Marketers need to build digital relationships and reputation before closing a sale. - Chris Brogan

I can trust my friends. These people force me to examine myself, encourage me to grow. - Cher

We learn the most from imperfect relationships - things like forgiveness and compassion. - Andrea Thompson

As a man in a relationship, you have a simple choice: You can be right or you can be happy. - Ralphie May

In times of prosperity friends will be plenty;
In time of adversity not one in twenty. - English Proverb

The easiest kind of relationship for me is with ten thousand people. The hardest is with one. - Joan Baez

Tart words make no friends: A spoonful of honey will catch more flies than a gallon of vinegar. - Benjamin Franklin

There's a thing that keeps surprising you about stormy old friends after they die: their silence. - Ben Hecht

The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart. - Unknown

The drink and I have been friends for so long, it would be a pity for me to leave without one last kiss. - Turlough O'Carolan

A man with a career can have no time to waste upon his wife and friends; he has to devote it wholly to his enemies. - John Hobbes

Happiness is being content with what you have, living in freedom and liberty, having a good family life and good friends. - Divyanka Tripathi

Two may talk together under the same roof for many years, yet never really meet; and two others at first speech are old friends. - Mary Catherwood

For almost seventy years the life insurance industry has been a smug sacred cow feeding the public a steady line of sacred bull. - Ralph Nader

Hunters will tell you that a moose is a wily and ferocious forest creature. Nonsense. A moose is a cow drawn by a three-year-old. - Bill Bryson

Wear a smile and have friends; wear a scowl and have wrinkles. What do we live for if not to make the world less difficult for each other? - George Eliot

As a matter of self-preservation, a man needs good friends or ardent enemies, for the former instruct him and the latter take him to task. - Diogenes

I like a quiet evening with family or friends over, great food and great discussion, and a lot of laughter. That's really what fills my tank. - Anna Eshoo

We spend precious hours fearing the inevitable. It would be wise to use that time adoring our families, cherishing our friends and living our lives. - Maya Angelou


Braided Horse Tail

Owl Glove

Far North Cable Guys

Openish Hours

Lead Sled Dog

Pet Food Tester

Gold Bar Carrot Cake

Looking For A Mate

Food For Thought

Kanye Twitty

Skull Tentacles

Ukrainian Cattle Car

CreepEye

Canadian Whiskey

Winter Tree

WrenchWare

Dog Sled

Winter Ready

Bread Dress

Bear With Me

Open-air schools in The Netherlands

Ghost Food

Toothpaste Holder

Two Face