#1 humor site on the 'net

A Woman's Mind

Easy-to-understand explanation of how the female mind works

A Woman's Mind thanks to Diane Baugh

QuotaBills
Candlestine romance - Archie Bunker

Marriage is heaven and hell. - German Proverb

Marriage is not a word but a sentence. - Unknown

Assumptions are the termites of relationships. - Henry Winkler

Love is a fair garden, and marriage a field of nettles. - Finnish Proverb

This is a feminist bookstore. There is no humour section. - John Callahan

In Hollywood, a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. - Rita Rudner

There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

Before you marry keep both eyes open; after marriage shut one. - Jamaican Proverb

Marriage: A word which should be pronounced "mirage." - Herbert Spencer

Sometimes I consider myself as a feminist, whatever that means. - Sarah Palin

Every politician should have been born an orphan and remain a bachelor. - Lady Bird Johnson

Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose. - F.M. Knowles

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship. - Sharon Stone

I wanted a man who wouldn't stray so I'm dating a guy on house arrest. - Kim Bove

I love romance. I'm a sucker for it. I love it so much. It's pathetic. - Drew Barrymore

Marriage is very difficult. It's like a 5,000-piece jigsaw puzzle, all sky. - Cathy Ladman

In marriage, being the right person is as important as finding the right person. - Wilbert Donald Gough

People who have good relationships at home are more effective in the marketplace. - Zig Ziglar

Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases. - Milton Berle

A long marriage is two people trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time. - Anne Taylor Fleming

How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive. - Oscar Wilde

Inspirations never go in for long engagements; they demand immediate marriage to action. - Unknown

Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel. - Leonardo da Vinci

Somehow a bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever. - Helen Rowland

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

The key to a long and healthy marriage is that, honestly, there's nothing worth fighting about. - Jay Leno

Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation. - Mark Twain

My husband always felt that a marriage and career don't mix. That's why he's never worked. - Phyllis Diller

Marriage is the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force. - Ogden Nash

Romance is thinking about your significant other, when you are supposed to be thinking about something else. - Nicholas Sparks

The most happy marriage I can picture or imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Remember that your best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other. - Unknown

Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. - Vicki Baum

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

Valentine's Day: Rubbing singles' noses in their lack of a mate and the noses of couples in their lack of time. - Emma McLaughlin

The greatest mistake we humans make in our relationships: we listen half, understand quarter, think zero, and react double. - Unknown

It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with the window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open. - George Bernard Shaw


Darth VadeHer

Submergible

Today's Paper Read Yesterday

Someone Is Upset

Texas Diet

Moose Crossing

Lost Meal

Plane Oops!

The Wheels of Life

Nerd Shaving

Beethoven's Teacher

Coke's Special Ingredients

Weather Warning

Freedom At Last

Ebola Can Be Eaten

Open Face Sandwich

Busted Politician

Balanced Diet

African Wheelbarrow

Drain Swimmer

Just In Thyme

Tie Wrap Bumper

Mexican Salad Dressing

Leaning Bookshelves