Texas Limo

Mayor: A he-horse - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Midnight bugs taste best. - Unknown

Use a little of your horse's sense. - Archie Bunker

When you're riding lead, don't spit. - Unknown

Parts of Texas look like Kansas with a goiter. - Unknown

Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse. - Groucho Marx

Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly. - Unknown

Texas is a hotbed of insanely good bands and musicians. - Henry Rollins

Centaur: A man with a horse where his pants ought to be - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

In plain Texas talk, it's 'do the right thing'. - Ross Perot

Horse Manure: 50p per pre-packed bag. 20p - do it your self. - Unknown

If you ride like there's no tomorrow, there won't be. - Unknown

I'm super laid back. I'm from Texas. I love my family. - Selena Gomez

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him float. - Unknown

In Texas it's always hot, dry, sunny, not a cloud in the sky. - Piper Perabo

You can not lead a battle if you think you look silly on a horse. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Riding: The art of keeping a horse between yourself and the ground - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Texas is now a cornerstone of the electoral college for Republicans. - Ed Gillespie

All music is folk music. I ain't never heard no horse sing a song. - Louis Armstrong

What do you call a cyclist who doesn't wear a helmet? An organ donor. - David Perry

Unicorn: 1. A single blemish on the foot; 2. A horse with a point of view. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute. - Jessica Savitch

Dude Ranch: Where a guy who is rich enough to drive a Cadillac rides a horse - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It's hard to lead a cavalry charge if you think you look funny on a horse. - Adlai Stevenson

Life may begin at 30, but it doesn't get real interesting until about 150. - Unknown

In fifty years, he never worked a day. To him, nine to five was odds on a horse. - Archie Bunker

Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may. - Sam Houston

Some people play a horse to win, some to place. I should have bet this horse to live. - Henny Youngman

You've got to concentrate on one idea. You can't ride a horse with two asses. - Joe Segal

One of the worst things that can happen in life is to win a bet on a horse at an early age. - Danny McGoorty

If a man's from Texas, he'll tell you. If he's not, why embarrass him by asking? - John Gunther

I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse. - Woody Allen

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

I'm from Texas, and one of the reasons I like Texas is because there's no one in control. - Willie Nelson

Most of my memories of Texas are of mosquitoes, watermelons, crickets, and my brother teasing me. - Robin Wright

Good thing we've still got politics in Texas - finest form of free entertainment ever invented. - Molly Ivins

When Henry Ford made cheap, reliable cars people said, 'Nah, what's wrong with a horse?' - Elon Musk

A fly, Sir, may sting a stately horse and make him wince; but, one is but an insect, and the other is a horse still. - Samuel Johnson

When you're young and you fall off a horse, you may break something. When you're my age and you fall off, you splatter. - Roy Rogers

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze