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Opinion Scale

Finding the perfect gift for her

Three men are sitting at a bar. The first says, “I bought my wife something which goes from 0 to 100 in 6 seconds - I bought her a nice Porsche.”

The second guy says, “I bought something which goes from 0 to 100 in 4 seconds - a nice red Ferrari.”

The third one says, “I bought my wife something which goes from 0 to 200 IN JUST 2 SECONDS!”
Opinion Scale thanks to Shawn Kennedy

QuotaBills
Life itself is a gift. - Daphne R Kingma

I'm a fat anorexic. - Kiri Te Kanawa

A balanced diet is chocolate in both hands. - Unknown

Gladly accept the gifts of the present hour. - Horace

You know why fish are so thin? They eat fish. - Jerry Seinfeld

It's simple. If it jiggles, it's fat. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Diets are for those who are thick and tired of it. - Unknown

The gods bestowed on him the gift of perpetual old age. - Oscar Wilde

Mankind's greatest gift is that we have free choice. - Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

Restore a man to his health, his purse lies open to thee. - Robert Burton

Our health is a voyage and every illness is an adventure story. - Margiad Evans

I don't mind that I'm fat. You still get the same money. - Marlon Brando

I find there is only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people. - Rodney Dangerfield

My metabolism stinks. I can gain weight just listening to dinner music. - Ron Dentinger

The key to a healthy lawn is to take care of what happens below ground. - Mike Bechtle

Never let success get to your head. Never let failure get to your health. - Unknown

Health is like money - we never have a true idea of its value until we lose it. - Josh Billings

Who ever hears of fat men heading a riot, or herding together in turbulent mobs? - Washington Irving

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. - Redd Foxx

To live is like to love - all reason is against it, and all healthy instinct for it. - Samuel Butler

People don't trust private health insurance companies for all the right reasons. - Bernie Sanders

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get. - Robert Orben

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt. - Erma Bombeck

Mental health problems do not affect three or four out of every five persons but one out of one. - William Menninger

I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond. - Mae West

If fat people just gave skinny people more food, we could solve obesity and hunger at the same time. - Ashton Kutcher

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said, "Cigarettes contain fat." - Dave Barry

A healthy male adult bore consumes each year one and a half times his own weight in other people's patience. - John Updike

New Zealand was one of the most beautiful countries to drive through for the scenery and the vast scale of the place. - Louise Nurding

Yesterday's the past, tomorrow's the future, but today is a gift. That's why it's called the present. - Bill Keane

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is God's Gift. That's why we call it the 'Present.' - Bill Keane

The first requisite of a good citizen in this republic of ours is that he shall be able and willing to pull his weight. - Theodore Roosevelt

The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned now to cook. - Andy Rooney

The two things that are going to make you a better baker without even trying are a scale and a thermometer in your oven. - Tom Douglas

The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other. - Johnny Carson

I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on. - Jean Kerr

Confidence is beautiful, no matter your size, no matter your weight. Be confident in who you are and you'll be beautiful. - Unknown

It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins

If someone offers you a gift, and you decline to accept it, the other person still owns that gift. The same is true of insults and verbal attacks. - Steve Pavlina

A gift is pure when it is given from the heart to the right person at the right time and at the right place, and when we expect nothing in return. - Vyasa


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