#1 humor site on the 'net

Nutcracker Suite - Chinese Version

Like painful ballet? Go to China for lessons

Nutcracker Suite - Chinese Version thanks to Lesley Mercado

QuotaBills
Pain is temporary; quitting is forever. - Lance Armstrong

Where a man feels pain he lays his hand. - Dutch Proverb

The pain passes, but the beauty remains. - Pierre-August Renoir

Pain and suffering are God's megaphone. - C S Lewis

God is a concept by which we measure our pain. - John Lennon

Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer. - Joan Rivers

A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain. - WC Fields

The two enemies of human happiness are pain and boredom. - Arthur Schopenhauer

We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey. - Kenji Miyazawa

How much pain have cost us the evils that have never happened. - Thomas Jefferson

Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits

The more you get past pain, the more it goes from coal to diamond. - Jodi Picoult

Pleasure of love lasts but a moment. Pain of love lasts a lifetime. - Bette Davis

Boxing is like jazz. The better it is, the less people appreciate it. - George Foreman

The great art of life is sensation; to feel that we exist, even in pain. - Lord Byron

He who makes a beast out of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man. - Dr. Seuss

Out of suffering comes creativity. You cannot spell painting without pain. - John Lithgow

Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain. - Joseph Campbell

No pain, no palm; no thorns, no throne; no gall, no glory; no cross, no crown. - William Penn

When I was a kid, I used to think pork chops and karate chops were the same thing. - Shane Koyczan

There's more to boxing than hitting. There's not getting hit, for instance. - George Foreman

My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee. - Phyllis Diller

You purchase pain with all that joy can give and die of nothing but a rage to live. - Alexander Pope

When you can tell the story and it doesn't bring up any pain, you known it is healed. - Lyanla Vanzant

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt. - Erma Bombeck

Boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other. - Jack Handey

I'm a 3rd degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do and 2nd degree in karate, and I'm a licensed bodyguard. - Katheryn Winnick

God loves us too much to leave us alone to contend with the pain, guilt and loneliness of our present life. - Josh McDowell

Meaninglessness does not come from being weary of pain; meaninglessness comes from being weary of pleasure. - G K Chesterton

The trouble with putting armor on is that, while it protects you from pain, it also protects you from pleasure. - Celeste Holm

The more pain that's referenced or implied, the deeper the laugh can be because the laughter heals the pain. - Mimi Kennedy

Pain is a sign that we are alive. Problems are a sign that we are strong. Prayer is a sign that we are not alone. - Unknown

I don't like creating software anymore. It's too exact. It's like karate; there's no room for error. - John Maeda

The pain you feel today is the strength you feel tomorrow. For every challenge encountered there is opportunity for growth. - Unknown

When I was younger I did karate and martial arts, and I think it's really cool for girls to have those kinds of abilities. - Rebel Wilson

Go figure a crazy, mixed-up country where ballet outsells boxing. I wouldn't be surprised if their wrestling was on the level. - Bob Hope

The pain started years ago, but I'd lived with it for so long at that point that I'd accepted it as an inevitable part of me. - Ashley Wallis

When I was nine, my father said 'You can take piano lessons or do karate' - I had a black belt and was competing before I was 19. - Elodie Yung

Stand-up and boxing are very similar. You're the only one out there, you're going into a fight, and you're going in with a game plan. - Russell Peters

Even if you can be the world's best at one thing, you'll be the world's worst at something else. Supermodels make pathetic sumo wrestlers. - Martha Beck


Florida Moves Out Of Hurricane Zone

Small Bills

Denmark Traffic Signals

Nail Polish Lookalilikes

Game Car

Overloaded Mailbox

Redneck Phone

Enjoy Fresh Air

Bread Board

Snaccident

Mini Bar

Frisbee Stopper

Redneck Sushi

Redneck's Lo-Tech Mobile Phone

Downchuck

Border Agent Alert

Cadillac Clearance

Leading By Example

Wired For Coffee

Cadillac Bike

Chip and Dip

Cat Couch Nap

Redneck Trophy Fish

Country Irony