QuotaBillsUltimate: The last person you marry - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Grace: nutrient in the marriage garden - Phil Callaway
I've seen better fights at a wedding. - Harry Redknapp
Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller
Love - a temporary insanity curable by marriage. - Ambrose Bierce
Getting married is an incredible act of hopefulness. - Ashley Judd
Second Marriage: The triumph of hope over experience. - Samuel Johnson
In Hollywood, a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. - Rita Rudner
The secret to a happy marriage? Do what your wife tells you. - Denzel Washington
I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years. - Sam Kinison
He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of. - Mae West
A girl must marry for love, and keep on marrying until she finds it. - Zsa Zsa Gabor
Marriage is too interesting an experiment to be tried only once or twice. - Eva Gabor
The Pirate is surrealism and so, in a curious way, is Father of the Bride. - Vincente Minnelli
I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman. - Arnold Schwarzenegger
Sir, it is your duty to get married. You can't be always living for pleasure. - Oscar Wilde
Bachelors: Married men may have better halves, but bachelors have better quarters - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive. - Oscar Wilde
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. - Mignon McLaughlin
Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed. - Oscar Wilde
Today couples live together until they learn to detest one another. Then they get married. - G K Chesterton
The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him. - Cher
If you marry a man who cheats on his wife, you'll be married to a man who cheats on his wife. - Ann Landers
Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck
For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones
Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard for the night, she can still survive. - WC Fields
I love being married. I was single for a long time, and I just got so sick of finishing my own sentences. - Brian Kiley
The most happy marriage I can picture or imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge
There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. - Sam Kinison
Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. - Vicki Baum
Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. - Ogden Nash
Marriage is like a beleaguered fortress: those who are outside want to get in, and those inside want to get out. - French Proverb
I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me. - Elayne Boosler
There is nothing in the world like the devotion of a married woman. It is a thing no married man knows anything about. - Oscar Wilde
The best reason for a knitter to marry is that you can't teach the cat to be impressed when you finish a lace scarf. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee
Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are. - Will Ferrell
Getting married is easy. Staying married is more difficult. Staying happily married for a lifetime should rank among the fine arts. - Roberta Flack
Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who make you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat. - Joanne Woodward
If you never want to see a man again, just tell him, "I love you. I want to marry you. I want to have children." They leave skid marks. - Rita Rudner
I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch." - Phyllis Diller