International Sign of Marriage

Marry money. - Max Shulman

Marriage is heaven and hell. - German Proverb

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - American Saying

A really good detective never gets married. - Raymond Chandler

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

In married life, three is company and two none. - Oscar Wilde

If you marry for money you will earn every penny. - Dr. Phil McGraw

Make love, not war... or get married and do both. - Unknown

Getting married is an incredible act of hopefulness. - Ashley Judd

In Hollywood, a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. - Rita Rudner

Now a soft kiss; Aye, by that kiss, I vow an endless bliss. - John Keats

The secret to a happy marriage? Do what your wife tells you. - Denzel Washington

Don't marry a tennis player - love means nothing to them. - Joan Rivers

I've been married twice but I haven't had a marriage yet. - Jennifer Lopez

The general rule is that people who enjoy life also enjoy marriage. - Phyllis Battelle

I was going to marry a gardener, but he was too rough around the hedges. - Unknown

Never marry anyone you could not sit next to during a three-day bus trip. - Roger Ebert

Marriage requires a special talent like acting. Monogamy requires genius. - Warren Beatty

Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose. - F.M. Knowles

If you have a boat and a happy marriage, you don't need another thing. - Ed McMahon

I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Marriage is very difficult. It's like a 5,000-piece jigsaw puzzle, all sky. - Cathy Ladman

No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying. - Unknown

I don't follow trends. I make each cake for a particular wedding, or event. - Ron Ben-Israel

A long marriage is two people trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time. - Anne Taylor Fleming

I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck. - WC Fields

Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

Rituals are important. Nowadays it's hip not to be married. I'm not interested in being hip. - John Lennon

The one charm of marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties. - Oscar Wilde

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

When I make a vow to God, then I would suggest to you that's even stronger than a handshake in Texas. - Rick Perry

Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories. - John Wilmot

The Irish Catholic side was married to the life of an actor and I found out acting could be a form of prayer. - Liam Neeson

I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me. - Elayne Boosler

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits and then complain that he's not the man she married? - Barbara Streisand

The best reason for a knitter to marry is that you can't teach the cat to be impressed when you finish a lace scarf. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

Twenty years of romance make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. - Oscar Wilde

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry

In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage. - Robert Anderson