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Stress makes you stupid. - Unknown

Facts are stupid things. - Ronald Reagan

Afford: Popular type of car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The buffalo is a surprisingly stupid animal. - Ellsworth Huntington

Mama says, 'Stupid is as stupid does.' - Forrest Gump

It is easy to be heavy; it is hard to be light. - G K Chesterton

Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung. - Voltaire

Most of life is choices, and the rest is pure dumb luck. - Marian Erickson

It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid. - George Bernard Shaw

I do not pray for a lighter load, but for a stronger back. - Philip Brookes

I never make stupid mistakes. Only very, very clever ones. - Unknown

I was deaf and dumb and blind to all but me, myself and I. - Loretta Young

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Grief is not as heavy as guilt, but it takes more away from you. - Veronica Roth

Don't worry about the horse being blind, just load the wagon. - John Madden

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid. - Benjamin Franklin

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

Take notes on the spot. A note is worth a cart-load of recollections. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

It's not the load that breaks you down, it's the way you carry it. - Lou Holtz

It is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that they are heavy. - C JoyBell

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

Come unto me, all ye who labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. - Matthew 11:28

Books are as useful to a stupid person as a mirror is useful to a blind person. - Chanakya

You'll never lighten the load until you feel the pressure in your own soul. - Ravi Zacharias

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. - Redd Foxx

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

You don't have to be smart to laugh at farts, but you have to be stupid not to. - Louis C.K.

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

A word to the wise ain't necessary. It's the stupid ones who need the advice. - Bill Cosby

I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield

A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice. - Bill Cosby

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

If you think your boss is stupid remember: you wouldn't have a job if he was smarter. - Albert Grant

Women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. - George Carlin

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

Although I am not stupid, the mathematical side of my brain is like dumb notes upon a damaged piano. - Margot Asquith

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

You might be a nurse if you firmly believe that "too stupid to live" should be a diagnosis. - Unknown

The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid. - Jane Austen

TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public. - Douglas Coupland

I've always hated the idea of carrying grudges and resentments around like a load of mouldy suitcases. - Victoria C Mitchell

A comic should suffer as much over a single line as a man with a hernia would in picking up a heavy barbell. - WC Fields

What sounds to you like a big load of trashy noise... is in fact... the brilliant music of a genius... myself. - Iggy Pop

They should have little disclaimer that says, "Do not operate heavy machinery while watching this show!" - Robin Williams

A juggernaut of onions has shed its load all over the M1. Motorists are advised to find a hard shoulder to cry on. - Ronnie Corbett

We're all trying to keep up in this stupid race. But that won't be much fun when we're floating in space. - John Symeou

No oppression is so heavy or lasting as that which is inflicted by the perversion and exorbitance of legal authority. - Joseph Addison

The fundamental cause of trouble in the world is that the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt. - Bertrand Russell

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

Nobody ever wrote down a plan to be broke, fat, lazy, or stupid. Those things are what happen when you don't have a plan. - Larry Winget

If one can only see things according to one's own belief system, one is destined to become virtually deaf, dumb, and blind. - Robert A. Wilson

If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions? - Scott Adams

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

Tonight we'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame. - Ronnie Corbett

You're supposed to eat the cows. They're great big lumbering, stupid things - they'd be everywhere if we didn't eat them. - Dylan Moran

These are stupid people that say, "Oh didn't Trump declare bankruptcy? Didn't he go bankrupt?" I didn't go bankrupt. - Donald Trump

Success in almost any field depends more on energy and drive than it does on intelligence. This explains why we have so many stupid leaders. - Sloan Wilson

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman