Gas Competitors Reach Agreement

Money often costs too much. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A fool and his money are soon parted. - English Proverb

A fool and her money are soon courted. - Helen Rowland

Emulsion: A mixture of oil and emotion. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Minutes are worth more than money. Spend them wisely. - Thomas P Murphy

Print some money and give it to us for the rain forests. - Vivienne Westwood

You used so much oil the U.S. is trying to invade the plate. - Gordon Ramsay

Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect it back. - Steven Wright

By the time I have money to burn, my fire will have burnt out. - Unknown

A wise man should have money in his head, but not in his heart. - Jonathan Swift

The rich would have to eat money if the poor did not provide food. - Russia Proverb

Anybody who thinks money will make you happy hasn't got money. - David Geffen

An education obtained with money is worse than no education at all. - Socrates

Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back. - Oscar Wilde

Never criticize Americans. They have the best taste that money can buy. - Miles Kington

The only point in making money is, you can tell some big shot where to go. - Humphrey Bogart

Advice is like castor oil, easy enough to give but dreadful uneasy to take. - Josh Billings

May you have warmth in your igloo, oil in your lamp, and peace in your heart. - Eskimo Proverb

Health is like money - we never have a true idea of its value until we lose it. - Josh Billings

There's so little money in my bank account, my scenic checks show a ghetto. - Phyllis Diller

In our world, more often the truth is 'Money talks and integrity walks.' - Bill Welker

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket. - Will Rogers

The safest way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket. - Kin Hubbard

Every sale has five basic obstacles: no need, no money, no hurry, no desire, no trust. - Zig Ziglar

France is a country where the money falls apart but you can't tear the toilet paper. - Billy Wilder

Money can't buy you happiness... but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery. - Spike Milligan

The chief value of money lies in the fact that one lives in a world in which it is overestimated. - H L Mencken

I'm proud to be paying taxes. The only thing is, I could be just as proud for half the money. - Arthur Godfrey

When a fellow says, 'It ain't the money but the principle of the thing,' it's the money. - Kin Hubbard

Money frees you from doing things you dislike.
Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy. - Groucho Marx

Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem. - Bill Vaughan

My family didn't have a lot of money, and I'm grateful for that. Money is the longest route to happiness. - Evangeline Lilly

Always remember money isn't everything - but also remember to make a lot of it before talking such fool nonsense. - Earl Wilson

Keeping books on social aid is capitalistic nonsense. I just use the money for the poor. I can't stop to count it. - Evita Peron

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff

I've never sought success in order to get fame and money; it's the talent and the passion that count in success. - Ingrid Bergman

People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made. - Joan Rivers

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke

The politicians in Washington are spending trillions of dollars of our money. When are Americans going to stand up and say enough is enough? - Joe Wurzelbacher

Oil prices have fallen lately. We include this news for the benefit of gas stations, which otherwise wouldn't learn of it for six months. - Bill Tammeus