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Downtown Speeding

When not to speed with your dragster

Downtown Speeding thanks to Bob Tasse

QuotaBills
Slow and steady wins the race. - Aesop

Police do not belong in war zones. - Daniel K Moran

Goose Bumps: To keep geese from speeding - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Traffic Ticket: Finale of the policeman's bawl - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The police are recruited from the criminal classes. - Gore Vidal

I am not a speed reader.
I am a speed understander. - Isaac Asimov

I do not regard a broker as a member of the human race. - Honore de Balzac

Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks. - Steven Wright

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

We all thought we'd have flying cars by now, but we don't. - Dana Brunetti

The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter. - Mark Twain

It is a lot harder now to be a police officer than what it used to be. - Steven Seagal

The human race is faced with a cruel choice: work or daytime television. - Dave Barry

Once upon a time, forests were repositories of magic for the human race. - John Burnside

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of civilization. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The police force cannot be completely independent of the executive government. - P Chidambaram

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

Sherbet: 1. A horse that can't lose; 2. A tip on a horse race or sporting event. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Police: The only people who are paid to go around pinching people in the wrong places - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Drive-in banks were established so most of the cars today could see their real owners. - E. Joseph Crossman

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

All are inclined to believe that they covet, from a lottery ticket up to a passport to Paradise. - Lord Byron

Diatribe: 1. An extinct race; 2. The group of native Brits that worship the late Princess Diana. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson

I took a speed reading course and read "War and Peace" in twenty minutes. It involves Russia. - Woody Allen

We are going as fast as we can as soon as we can. We're in a race against time, until we run out of money. - Jack Nicholson

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

How many ideas have there been in the history of the human race that were unthinkable ten years before they appeared? - Fyodor Dostoevsky

The actual building of roads devoted to motor cars is not for the near future, in spite of many rumors to that effect. - Harper's Weekly

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

If this humor be the safety of our race, then it is due largely to the infusion into the American people of the Irish brain. - William Howard Taft

It's like running a marathon race. We train all hours of the day. When you are taking a bath, you are thinking of the flight. - Kalpana Chawla

Tonight we'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame. - Ronnie Corbett

Contempt for happiness is usually contempt for other people's happiness, and is an elegant disguise for hatred of the human race. - Bertrand Russell

When a train goes through a tunnel and it gets dark, you don't throw away the ticket and jump off. You sit still and trust the engineer. - Corrie Ten Boom

When you have police officers who abuse citizens, you erode public confidence in law enforcement. That makes the job of good police officers unsafe. - Mary F Berry

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright


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