#1 humor site on the 'net

Downer Rental Car

Only downside to this rental car is its clingon grip

Downer Rental Car thanks to Martin Grosse

Ideal car for Spiderman with nowhere to go!

QuotaBills
Billboards: Litter on a stick - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It is easier to pull down than to build up. - Latin Proverb

Sticking with your family is what makes it a family. - Mitch Albom

One who sits between two chairs may easily fall down. - Romanian and Russian Proverb

The kind man feeds his cat before sitting down to dinner. - Hebrew Proverb

She died doing what she loved, taking a selfie in traffic. - Unknown

Not doing more than average is what keeps the average down. - William M. Winans

Quiet is peace. Quiet is turning down the volume knob on life. - Khaled Hosseini

The Meathead swooped down on the table like a plague of crocuses. - Archie Bunker

A dentist at work in his vocation always looks down in the mouth. - George D. Prentice

It isn't life that weighs us down - it's the way we carry it. - Elizabeth Potier

There is nothing deep down inside us except what we have put there ourselves. - Richard Rorty

Ignore the naysayers. Really the only option is, head down and focus on the job. - Chris Pine

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

I stuck my head out the window this morning and spring kissed my bang in the face. - Langston Hughes

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well. I was amazed - I never knew they worked. - Les Dawson

I've spent three hours hanging upside down while fighting off dinosaur attacks. - Jason O'Mara

I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile. Then walk into a pole. - Unknown

If one cannot invent a really convincing lie, it is often better to stick to the truth. - Angela Thirkell

If you burn your neighbor's house down, it doesn't make your house look any better. - Lou Holtz

I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street when suddenly the prescription ran out. - Steven Wright

A habit cannot be tossed out the window. It must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time. - Mark Twain

The truly free man is the one who will turn down an invitation to dinner without giving an excuse. - Jules Renard

One day someone is going to hug you so tight that all of your broken pieces will stick back together. - Unknown

Congratulations, you have a sense of humor. And to those who didn't: Go stick your head in the mud. - Jesse Ventura

Don't waste a minute not being happy. If one window closes, run to the next window - or break down a door. - Brooke Shields

I walk like a duck: very straight up and down. Or like a penguin. It's a dead giveaway that I'm a dancer. - David Hallberg

Figure out what you hope for. Live inside that hope, running down its hallways, touching the walls on both sides. - Barbara Kingsolver

What would you do if you were stuck in one place and every day was exactly the same, and nothing you did mattered? - Bill Murray

I heard his library burned down and both books were destroyed - and one of them hadn't even been colored in yet. - Robertson Davies

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

The actual building of roads devoted to motor cars is not for the near future, in spite of many rumors to that effect. - Harper's Weekly

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend on reading it. - Groucho Marx

I wish I had a nickel for every song that I've left in the bathroom, written down on a matchbox, or just totally forgotten about. - Tommy Shaw

Man has made 32 million laws since the Commandments were handed down to Moses on Mount Sinai... but he has never improved on God's law. - Cecil B. DeMille

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman

As long as you keep a person down, some part of you has to be down there to hold him down, so it means you cannot soar as you otherwise might. - Marian Anderson

A proud man is always looking down on things and people; and, of course, as long as you are looking down, you cannot see something that is above you. - C S Lewis

Lawyers are like unrequited lovers: you give them an inch, and they go for the whole nine yards; you take off one shoe, and they pull down your pants. - Andres Rueda


Batman Recession

Sinus Remedy - How To Clear Out Your Nostrils

About Grandparents

Split Personality Ad

Happy Bithday

Back 2 School Savings

Redneck Wine Dispenser

Balloon Advertising for Exploding Results

Cowboy Baby Carrier

Make Womb For Baby

Turtle Truck

Zipper Building

Hobo Facebook

Cart Man - Biker To The Rescue

'I Look Like My Dog' Contest

Employee Happiness Kit

Back To School Supplies

Pigeon Target Practice

Autumn Tree

Motorcycle Enforcement in Japan

Safe Sex Dress

'Time To Quit' Friend

Ostrich Passion

How To Spot An Amish Terrorist