Big Birth - They Start Off Big At This Hospital

Nipper: Baby crab - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Birth patrol pills. - Archie Bunker

Deceitful: Infant who needs changing - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Stoic: De boid what brings de babies - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I was with book, as a woman is with child. - C S Lewis

A child's first teacher is its mother. - Peng Liyuan

A baby's laugh is an angel's voice. - Unknown

One hour with a child is like a ten-mile run. - Joan B. Samuelson

Infancy conforms to nobody; all conform to it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

De-caffeinated: What a cow gets when it has a baby - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A new toy is something a child uses to break his old toys. - Joe-kster

Every baby born into the world is a finer one than the last. - Charles Dickens

The great man is one who never loses his child’s heart. - Mencius

The only thing worth stealing is a kiss from a sleeping child. - Joe Houldsworth

I look in the mirror through the eyes of the child that was me. - Judy Collins

One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control. - Rodney Dangerfield

One child, one teacher, one book, one pen can change the world. - Malala Yousafzai

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying. - Fran Lebowitz

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. - Leo J Burke

I'm a New Wave baby, so I got very stimulated by foreign film. - Jack Nicholson

My Birth Certificate is so old, it's written in Roman Numerals. - Bill Carter

As a child, the only clear thought I had was "Get candy." - Jerry Seinfeld

Every child needs a father. Even if he turns out to be Darth Vader. - Jackson Radcliffe

No matter how bad a child is, he is still good for a tax deduction. - American Proverb

Having a baby is like trying to push a grand piano through a transom. - Alice Roosevelt Longworth

A very small degree of hope is sufficient to cause the birth of love. - Stendhal

Experience is the child of thought, and thought is the child of action. - Benjamin Disraeli

Insomnia: a contagious disease often transmitted from babies to parents. - Shannon Fife

There's only one pretty child in the world, and every mother has it. - English Proverb

Back then the women had babies, which they called in them days, begatten. - Archie Bunker

Baby: a loud noise at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other. - Ronald Knox

There never was a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him asleep. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five. - Groucho Marx

Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard

You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test. - George W. Bush

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby. - Natalie Wood

The firsts go away - first love, first baby, first kiss. You have to create new ones. - Sarah Jessica Parker

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

The most effective kind of education is that a child should play amongst lovely things. - Plato

There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million. - Walt Streightiff

When I see my granddaughters make small discoveries of their own, I wish I were a child. - Dr. Seuss

A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children. - Dave Barry

When I was a child, I wanted to raise horses in Wyoming or be a cabin boy on a pirate ship. - Sadie Jones

It's easier to build up a child than it is to repair an adult. Choose your words wisely. - Unknown

Sprouts: Innocent green plants snatched in their infancy and devoured alive by ravenous vegetarians - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I was such an ugly baby. My mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend. - Rodney Dangerfield

If the loss of shame was the child of secularization, the loss of reason is the child of pluralization. - Ravi Zacharias

A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. - Enid Bagnold

The only way we can ever teach a child to say "I'm sorry" is for him to hear it from our lips first. - Kevin Leman

There's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender. - WC Fields

Do you think you're safe in a car with your seatbelt on? Dream on. My friend thought so. Now she's pregnant. - Anke Engelke

Menopause: because nature decided that pregnancy, labor, delivery, breastfeeding, and stretch marks wasn't enough. - Unknown

There's nothing that can help you understand your beliefs more than trying to explain them to an inquisitive child. - Frank A. Clark

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

He adopted a role called being a father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a protector. - Tom Wolfe

Babies are bits of stardust, blown from the hand of God. Lucky the woman who knows the pangs of birth, for she has held a star. - Larry Barratto

Grandparent: 1. One who knows that spanking is unnecessary; 2. The simplest toy, one which even the youngest child can operate. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Forgiveness is that subtle thread that binds both love and friendship. Without forgiveness, you may not even have a child one day. - George Foreman

It takes someone really brave to be a mother, someone strong to raise a child, and someone special to love someone more than herself. - Unknown

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? - George Carlin

Life is a child playing around your feet, a tool you hold firmly in your grip, a bench you sit down upon in the evening, in your garden. - Jean Anouilh

Religion is something left over from the infancy of our intelligence, it will fade away as we adopt reason and science as our guidelines. - Bertrand Russell

I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Without this playing with fantasy no creative work has ever yet come to birth. The debt we owe to the play of the imagination is incalculable. - Carl Jung

Forgiveness is the answer to the child's dream of a miracle by which what is broken is made whole again, what is soiled is made clean again. - Dag Hammarskjold