#1 humor site on the 'net

Underwater Radar Trap

Police come up with new Underwater Radar technique

Underwater Radar Trap thanks to Roy Bishop

QuotaBills
Unsafe at any speed. - Ralph Nader

OK, so what's the speed of dark? - Steven Wright

Damn the torpedoes! Full speed ahead! - David Farragut

Goose Bumps: To keep geese from speeding - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Speed is not a priority, just enjoy your hike. - Barry Putra

There is more to life than increasing its speed. - Mahatma Gandhi

The speed of a runaway horse counts for nothing. - Jean Cocteau

The police are recruited from the criminal classes. - Gore Vidal

In skating over thin ice our safety is in our speed. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Walter Mondale has all the charisma of a speed bump. - Will Durst

I am not a speed reader.
I am a speed understander. - Isaac Asimov

The speed of the leader determines the rate of the pack. - Wayne Lukas

Once you're over the hill, you begin to pick up speed. - Charles M Shulz

Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks. - Steven Wright

Police Station: A place where sleeping is all right in a pinch - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

It is a lot harder now to be a police officer than what it used to be. - Steven Seagal

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

Sleeping is my drug; my bed is my dealer; and my alarm clock is the police. - Unknown

The police are not here to create disorder, they;re here to preserve disorder. - Richard J Daley

The police force cannot be completely independent of the executive government. - P Chidambaram

There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your girlfriend. - Jack Nicholson

The toilets at a local police station have been stolen. Police say they have nothing to go on. - Ronnie Corbett

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson

I took a speed reading course and read "War and Peace" in twenty minutes. It involves Russia. - Woody Allen

The elderly don't drive that badly; they're just the only ones with time to do the speed limit. - Jason Love

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest. - Kin Hubbard

Women are like the police. They could have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession. - Chris Rock

I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife. - Ilie Nastase

Faith is belief in what you cannot see or prove or touch. Faith is walking face-first and full-speed into the dark. - Elizabeth Gilbert

Speed Limit: The velocity one must exceed by approximately 10 MPH on a major highway or risk being run off the road - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

At the end of a marathon, it's going to hurt whether you're speeding up or slowing down. You may as well push. - Summer Sanders

I'm being kidnapped by a comforter, sheet and pillow. No need to call the police for I will be released by morning. - Unknown

I took a course in speed reading. Then I got Reader's Digest on microfilm. By the time I got the machine set up, I was done. - Steven Wright

When I was a kid, one cop could have taken care of the whole neighborhood. Now, one cop wouldn't be safe in the neighborhood. - Mike Royko

I think our police are excellent, probably because I have not done anything that has occasioned being beaten up by these good men. - Clement Freud

When you have police officers who abuse citizens, you erode public confidence in law enforcement. That makes the job of good police officers unsafe. - Mary F Berry

One of the fondest expressions around is that we can't be the world's policeman. But guess who gets called when suddenly someone needs a cop. - Colin Powell


Balanced Meal

Acoustic Hearing Aids

Redneck Advent Calendar

Programmer Logic

Lego Haircut

Lettuce Face

Hammock Wine

Catch Anything Lately?

Dead Batteries

Frozen Fish

How Do You Spell L-U-C-K-Y?

Stretch Line - Down To The Wire

Milkshake Diet

Bicycle Logging

Texas 4 Months Apart

Flat Tire Repair

Double Error Message

Redneck Candle

Tenacity

Better Call Saul

Hair Notes

Gold Silk Fabric

Orthodox Weapon

Chanukah Special