Home Alone Pets

My favorite animal is steak. - Fran Lebowitz

We hold these semi-animal meetings. - Archie Bunker

Only animals were not expelled from Paradise. - Milan Kundera

Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to. - Mark Twain

Mmmm, pork chops and bacon... my two favorite animals. - Homer Simpson

Having an animal in your life makes you a better human. - Rachel Ray

Hot Dog: The only animal that feeds the hand that bites it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

All animals are equal, but some are more equal than others. - George Orwell

The only meat I eat is from animals I've killed myself. - Mark Zuckerberg

For an animal person, an animal-less home is no home at all. - Cleveland Amory

Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. - George Carlin

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere. - Groucho Marx

What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant? - George Carlin

I'm definitely an animal lover, and I stand up for all animals' rights. - Laura Mennell

The musician is perhaps the most modest of animals, but he is also the proudest. - Erik Satie

Love the animals: God has given them the rudiments of thought and joy untroubled. - Fyodor Dostoyevsky

I'm so ugly I worked in a pet shop, and people kept asking how big I'd get. - Rodney Dangerfield

My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It's in the apartment somewhere. - Steven Wright

Moose: An animal that has a head and horns on one end and a living room wall on the other - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Often, the human animal dresses terror in rage, and expresses both in a way unlike either. - Julius Lester

I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals. I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants. - A. Whitney Brown

I'm kind of honored to be a dragon lady. The dragon is a very powerful, mythical animal. - Yoko Ono

At his best, man is the noblest of all animals; separated from law and justice he is the worst. - Aristotle

Without my pets, my wallet would be full, my house would be clean, but my heart would be empty. - Unknown

Men are the only animals that devote themselves, day in and day out, to making one another unhappy. - H L Mencken

Human language appears to be a unique phenomenon, without significant analogue in the animal world. - Noam Chomsky

A moose is an animal with horns on the front of its head and a hunting lodge wall on the back of it. - Groucho Marx

I like cookies, any cookie you put in front of me - animal cookies, sugar cookies, anything crunchy. - Maria Shriver

I was readin' an article about the animal population - there's millions of pets explodin'. - Archie Bunker

Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals... except the weasel. - Homer Simpson

Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs. - P J O'Rourke

It is just like man's vanity and impertinence to call an animal dumb because it is dumb to his dull perceptions. - Mark Twain

You love flowers, but you cut them. You love animals, but you eat them. You tell me you love me, so now I'm scared. - Unknown

I think I could turn and live with animals, they are so placid and self-contained. I stand and look at them long and long. - Walt Whitman

Man is a credulous animal, and must believe something; in the absence of good grounds for belief, he will be satisfied with bad ones. - Bertrand Russell

Animals have one thing that puts them way ahead of people: they don't dissemble, and you don't have to pretend in front of them. - Ivan Klima

Ugly animals have it rough. We're more likely to eat them or let them go extinct, and less likely to adopt them from animal shelters. - Joshua A Krisch

Ever occur to you why some of us can be this much concerned with animals suffering? Because government is not. Why not? Animals don't vote. - Paul Harvey

Man is the only animal who enjoys the consolation of believing in a next life; all other animals enjoy the consolation of not worrying about it. - Robert Brault

Animals, in their generation, are wiser than the sons of men; but their wisdom is confined to a few particulars, and lies in a very narrow compass. - Joseph Addison