Diverse Women Drivers

Women Liberteens - Archie Bunker

Women hold up half the sky. - Mao Zedong

Some leaders are born women. - Unknown

Feminism is a wonderful idea until the car goes wrong. - Nicola Zweig

We're women. We have a double standard to live up to. - Ally McBeal

What would men be without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce. - Mark Twain

All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women. - WC Fields

Irene Lorenzo, queen of the Women's Lubrication Movement. - Archie Bunker

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age. - George Burns

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

The husbands of very beautiful women belong to the criminal classes. - Oscar Wilde

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them. - Groucho Marx

Back then the women had babies, which they called in them days, begatten. - Archie Bunker

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning. - Aristotle Onassis

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

He who has two women loses his soul. But he who has two homes loses his mind. - Ancient Proverb

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

Drive-in banks were established so most of the cars today could see their real owners. - E. Joseph Crossman

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be the designated driver. - Jay Leno

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

If women want any rights more than they got, why don't they just take them and not be talking about it? - Sojourner Truth

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pick-up truck, and end up with a station wagon. - Tim Allen

Women are like the police. They could have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession. - Chris Rock

Women are the most powerful magnet in the universe. And all men are cheap metal. And we all know where north is. - Larry Miller

I like the West. That's where men are men and women are women, and it's hard to beat a combination like that. - Milton Berle

Our duty, as men and women, is to proceed as if limits to our ability did not exist. We are collaborators in creation. - Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs. - Unknown

Part of the reason that men seem so much less loving than women is that men's behavior is measured with a feminine ruler. - Francesca M. Cancian

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown

Tonight we'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame. - Ronnie Corbett

Don't let the age on your driver's license determine your season in life. Everyone's growing seasons look a bit different. - Vicki Kuyper

A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: Duh. - Conan O'Brien

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking. - Bill Vaughan

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz