#1 humor site on the 'net

The Story of 20 Toes

There, I toe'd you so!

The Story of 20 Toes thanks to Warren Ralston

Much too long a story for most guys I know of...

QuotaBills
Marriage is not a word but a sentence. - Unknown

Death ends a life, not a relationship. - Jack Lemmon

Fame is proof that the people are gullible. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. - Paula Deen

Habits form character, and character forms destiny. - James Allen

Public behavior is merely private character writ large. - Stephen Covey

The proper basis for marriage is mutual misunderstanding. - Oscar Wilde

Character is, for the most part, simply habit become fixed. - C.H. Parkhurst

Character is the root of the tree; conduct, the fruit it bears. - E.M. Bounds

The great myth of our times is that technology is communication. - Libby Larsen

Marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever. - Quentin Crisp

Talent is formed in solitude, character in the bustle of the world. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

I don't really get romance. Bring me fish or moose, not flowers. - Eden Robinson

It is of little traits that the greatest human character is composed. - William Winter

The 3 fastest means of communication: Twitter; Telephone; Tell a woman. - Unknown

Find someone who will change your life, not just your relationship status. - Abdul'Rauf Hashmi

The woman who can create her own job is the one who will win fame and fortune. - Amelia Earhart

The great majority of neuroses in women have their origin in the marriage bed. - Sigmund Freud

I love romance. I'm a sucker for it. I love it so much. It's pathetic. - Drew Barrymore

I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. - Gloria Steinem

Peppering your relationship with a dash of mystery can make it far more palatable. - Khang K. Nguyen

Marriage is the harmony of God synchronizing two wills with the will of the Father. - Ravi Zacharias

Change is an easy panacea. It takes character to stay in one place and be happy there. - Elizabeth Clarke Dunn

How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive. - Oscar Wilde

People seem not to see that their opinion of the world is also a confession of character. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

It requires less character to discover the faults of others than is does to tolerate them. - J. Petit Senn

This I conceive to be the chemical function of humor: to change the character of our thought. - Lin Yutang

The easiest kind of relationship for me is with ten thousand people. The hardest is with one. - Joan Baez

Any disaster you can survive is an improvement in your character, your stature, and your life. - Joseph Campbell

Character is better than ancestry, and personal conduct is of more importance than the highest. - Thomas J. Barnardo

A true relationship is when you can tell each other anything and everything. No secrets, no lies. - Unknown

A man of character does not expect to be liked by everyone, nor does he worry about being liked by anyone. - Unknown

There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. - Sam Kinison

When lying and omission become part of your character, you lose integrity and the trust you once had from others. - Theodore W Fedorchak

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them. - Ogden Nash

A dinosaur out of context is like a character without a story. Worse than that, the character suffers from amnesia. - Jack Horner

Relationships are about give and take; not tit-for-tat. If you're keeping score, you'll lose at your own game. - Faydra D. Fields

The main business of a lawyer is to take the romance, the mystery, the irony, the ambiguity out of everything he touches. - Antonin Scalia

The quality of your life is determined by the quality of your relationships. The quality of your business is no different. - Harvey Mackay

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you. - Helen Rowland


Someone Is Upset

Turkey Popcorn Dressing

Redneck Outhouse Throne

I'll Be Right There

How Not To Prop Start Your Plane

Young Superman

When Not To Stop Too Fast

Bustache

CheckMate

Plane Oops!

Sand Dive

Manitoba Home Security System

WinDoor

Bungee Cord Suspenders

Mirror Solution

Beerbulance

Handicap Motorcyclist

Filling Up Is OverRated

Coin Stacking

I Miss Being A Tree

Stoned In The Garden

Looking For Something?

LadyNet

Louvre Paintings