QuotaBillsOrder is Heaven's first law. - Alexander Pope
Lawyers are the jackals of commerce. - Elbert Hubbard
Lawyers, I suppose, were children once. - Charles Lamb
Justice is incidental to law and order. - J Edgar Hoover
OK, if you can get an indepartial judge. - Archie Bunker
A flagrant violation of international law. - Unknown
Our ancestors ... were laborers, not lawyers. - Thomas Jefferson
Keep skunks, bankers and lawyers at a distance. - Unknown
I'm trusting in the Lord and a good lawyer. - Oliver North
Judge, could I, waddya call, encroach the bench? - Archie Bunker
We are never to judge a philosophy by its abuse. - Augustine
Lawyers and painters can soon change white to black. - Henry G Bohn
Ignorance of the law excuses no man from practicing it. - Addison Mizner
After money in the bank, a grudge is the next best thing. - Anthony Trollope
Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines? - George Carlin
The ablest lawyers are always associated with the biggest fees. - Clarence Darrow
Lawyers are like beavers. They get in the mainstream and dam it up. - John Naisbitt
He who will always be his own lawyer will often have a fool for a client. - J Hunter
It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes. - Sally Field
I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport. - Henny Youngman
The Second Law of Pies: they must be baked, not fried (or boiled, or steamed). - Janet Clarkson
You cannot live without the lawyers, and certainly you cannot die without them. - Joseph H Choate
Lawyers are like scissors; they never cut each other, but what is between them. - Unknown
Lawyers generally know too much of law to have a very clear perception of justice. - Eliza Cook
Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account. - Oscar Wilde
A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it. - Bob Hope
My mother-in-law has so many wrinkles, when she smiles she looks like a Venetian blind. - Les Dawson
To make laws that man cannot, and will not obey, serves to bring all law into contempt. - Elizabeth C Stanton
It is the trade of lawyers to question everything, yield nothing, and talk by the hour. - Thomas Jefferson
Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle
Lawyers are like the knights of old. You can use them to plunder other people's stuff. - Gene Gordon
If the laws could speak for themselves, they would complain of the lawyers in the first place. - George Savile
At his best, man is the noblest of all animals; separated from law and justice he is the worst. - Aristotle
The law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges. - Anatole France
A lawyer is a gentleman that rescues your estate from your enemies and then keeps it to himself. - Henry P Brougham
We lawyers learn to study the faces of our witnesses, to form quick judgments, and to act upon them. - Lyman Abbott
We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing, while others judge us by what we have already done. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer
The legal system is often a mystery, and we, its priests, preside over rituals baffling to everyday citizens. - Henry G. Miller
People judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold, but so has a hard-boiled egg. - Unknown
I have a huge interest in hockey because I grew up in Canada, where it's kind of the law that you love hockey. - Matthew Perry
Some lawyers are like unto the camel, which, before drinking out of a brook, maketh the water turbid with his foot. - Adolphus W Ward
If you owe the bank $100 that's your problem. If you owe the bank $100 million, that's the bank's problem. - J Paul Getty
That old law about "an eye for an eye" leaves everybody blind. The time is always right to do the right thing. - Rev. Martin Luther King Jr.
Lawyers were notorious for finding cases in the most unlikely places, especially ones with huge potential damage awards. - Jodi Picoult
How lawyers make work for one another! You're all priests, worshipping the same god. No wonder you adore one another. - Joyce Carol Oates
Anyone who takes it on himself, on his own authority, to break a bad law, thereby authorizes everyone else to break the good ones. - Denis Diderot
Lawyers are like cheeses. There are lots of good ones, but not everybody likes the taste of some or can afford the best of others. - Robin Ellison
Man has made 32 million laws since the Commandments were handed down to Moses on Mount Sinai... but he has never improved on God's law. - Cecil B. DeMille
The Post Office just recalled their newest stamps. They had a picture of lawyers on them, and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on. - Marvin Lebman