#1 humor site on the 'net

Changing Priorities Ahead

Sign of the times?

Changing Priorities Ahead thanks to Karen Moore

QuotaBills
Ethics change with technology. - Larry Niven

Things do not change; we change. - Henry David Thoreau

Change favors those who are prepared. - Louis Pasteur

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

A spotless house is a sign of a misspent life. - Unknown

Life is change. Growth is optional. Choose wisely. - Karen K Clark

To play billiards well is a sign of ill-spent youth. - Charles Roupell

Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be. - John Wooden

The more things change, the more they remain the same. - Alphonse Karr

If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts. - Albert Einstein

When things change inside you, things change around you. - Unknown

Making the family a top priority will invariably bring success. - Zig Ziglar

Reality can be lost when reason and language have been violated. - Ravi Zacharias

There are three constants in life: change, choice and principles. - Stephen Covey

When we make God's priorities our priorities, God blesses us. - David Jeremiah

How do we change the world? One random act of kindness at a time. - Morgan Freeman

I can change a No. 1 diaper in 30 seconds and a No. 2 in a minute. - John Tesh

You can change your beliefs so they empower your dreams and desires. - Marcia Wieder

Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future. - Paul Boese

Stay the course, light a star, change the world where'er you are. - Richard Le Gallienne

Win as if you were used to it. Lose as if you enjoyed it for a change. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Love is something eternal; the aspect may change, but not the essence. - Vincent van Gogh

A great many people think that polysyllables are a sign of intelligence. - Barbara Walters

It often takes more courage to change one's opinion than to stick to it. - Geoffrey Abert

Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing. - John Erskine

There is danger in reckless change, but greater danger in blind conservatism. - Henry George

It is often a sign of wit not to show it, and not to see that others want it. - Suzanne Necker

It is said to be the manner of hypochondriacs to change often their physician. - William Cullen

To change one's life: Start immediately. Do it flamboyantly. No exceptions. - William James

If I had to do my life over, I would change every single thing that I have done. - Ray Davies

The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change. - Carl Rogers

Three problems we have: lack of boundaries, insufficient language, incompletions. - Thomas Leonard

The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed". - Dorothy Parker

We can have no progress without change, whether it be basketball or anything else. - John Wooden

If we could see the miracle of a single flower clearly, our whole life would change. - Buddha

Life is like an ever-shifting kaleidoscope - a slight change and all patterns alter. - Susan Salzberg

The language of the law must not be foreign to the ears of those who are to obey it. - Learned hand

Money and success don't change people; they merely amplify what is already there. - Will Smith

We really have everything in common with America nowadays except, of course, language. - Oscar Wilde

Everybody laughs the same in every language because laughter is a universal connection. - Yakov Smirnoff

If you want to know who is going to change this country, go home and look in the mirror. - Maude Barlow

If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk a sign? - Albert Einstein

A Caterpie may change into a Butterfree, but the heart that beats inside remains the same. - Brock

The world has entered an era of the most profound and challenging change in human history. - Stephen Covey

You can't change your situation. The only thing you can change is how you deal with it. - 500 Days of Summer

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk? - Laurence J. Peter

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank. - Woody Allen

Sometimes if you want to see a change for the better, you have to take things into your own hands. - Clint Eastwood

The names of colors are at the edge, between where language fails and where it's at its most powerful. - A.S. Byatt

If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative. - Woody Allen

It's a sign of age if you feel like the morning after the night before and you haven't been anywhere. - Unknown

What we think determines what happens to us, so if we want to change our lives, we need to stretch our minds. - Wayne Dyer

When obstacles arise, you change your direction to reach your goal. You do not change your decision to get there. - Zig Ziglar

Pain is a sign that we are alive. Problems are a sign that we are strong. Prayer is a sign that we are not alone. - Unknown

Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed. - Albert Einstein

Language, identity, place, home: these are all of a piece - just different elements of belonging and not-belonging. - Jhumpa Lahiri

It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change. - Charles Darwin

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits and then complain that he's not the man she married? - Barbara Streisand

The longest word in the English language is the one following the phrase, "And now a word from our sponsor." - Hal Eaton

Learning is a lifelong process of keeping abreast of change. And the most pressing task is to teach people how to learn. - Peter F Drucker

Morals are an acquirement - like music, like a foreign language, like piety, poker, paralysis - no man is born with them. - Mark Twain

I glanced out the window at the signs of spring. The sky was almost blue, the trees were almost budding, the sun was almost bright. - Millard Kaufman

Always try to use the language so as to make quite clear what you mean and make sure your sentence couldn't mean anything else. - C S Lewis

I can change a diaper in 30 seconds flat. I set the new one beneath the old one. That way, it's just wipe and pull the flap over. - Drew Brees

A man’s life is interesting primarily when he has failed – I well know. For it’s a sign that he tried to surpass himself. - Georges Clemenceau

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

Morality cannot be legislated, but behavior can be regulated. Judicial decrees may not change the heart, but they can restrain the heartless. - Martin Luther King Jr.

I remain convinced that obstinate addiction to ordinary language in our private thoughts is one of the main obstacles to progress in philosophy. - Bertrand Russell

No one is in control of your happiness but you; therefore, you have the power to change anything about yourself or your life that you want to change. - Barbara DeAngelis


One

Tonsil Ring

Brew Haul-her - 12 Brewskies At A Time

Anon-y-moose

Redneck Beer Opener

Greek Monk

Dates For Everyone

Max Occupancy Rounded to 100

Group Photo

Awning Truck Advertising

Harley Load

Face To Face

Who Needs Physics?

Benched Puppies

Water Relief

Shot Glasses

Men in Denim

Chocolate Couch

Ant Attack

Extreme Pressure Cooker

Just Thinking

Nothing Wrong Picture

Lipstick Dog

Hair Strengthener