#1 humor site on the 'net

Ain't Mowing the Lawn Anymore

Enough of the yard work!

Ain't Mowing the Lawn Anymore thanks to Phoebe Moll,Raub, North Dakota

QuotaBills
Passion + Planning = Success - Barry Farber

Nothing succeeds like success. - Alexander Dumas

The best revenge is massive success. - Frank Sinatra

Inspiration and genius - one and the same. - Victor Hugo

Where there is no vision, there is no hope. - George Washington Carver

Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm. - Steven Wright

At first we hope too much, later on, not enough. - Unknown

Hope is a good breakfast, but it is a bad supper. - Sir Francis Bacon

Success is how high you bounce when you hit bottom. - George S Patton

Man is a victim of dope in the incurable form of hope. - Ogden Nash

Success means doing the best we can with what we have. - Zig Ziglar

Where there is no future before a people, there is no hope. - Edward Wilmot Blyden

Maybe all one can do is hope to end up with the right regrets. - Arthur Miller

The only place where success comes before work is a dictionary. - Vidal Sassoon

Making the family a top priority will invariably bring success. - Zig Ziglar

The success that the Tolkien books had redefined modern fantasy. - George R.R. Martin

No one was ever great without some portion of divine inspiration. - Cicero

Passion makes the world go round. Love just makes it a safer place. - Ice-T

Success is going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm. - Winston Churchill

Leaders inspire. They aren't assigned leadership. They command it. - Dr. Phil McGraw

There is no place where success comes before work, except in the dictionary. - Donald Kimball

Optimism is the one quality more associated with success and happiness than any other. - Brian Tracy

The best thing that can come with success is the knowledge that it is nothing to long for. - Liv Ullman

Why is America the last best hope of Earth? What if it's Liechtenstein? Or, worse, Canada? - Sarah Vowell

There's one good thing about snow: it makes your lawn look as nice as your neighbor's. - Clyde Moore

If you have zest and enthusiasm, you attract zest and enthusiasm. Life does give back in kind. - Norman Vincent Peale

I don't know the key to success but I know the key to failure is trying to please everybody. - Unknown

Admiration is a very short-lived passion, that immediately decays upon growing familiar with its object. - Joseph Addison

The foundation stones for a balanced success are honesty, character, integrity, faith, love and loyalty. - Zig Ziglar

Courage will now be your best defence against the storm that is at hand - that and such hope as I bring. - JRR Tolkien

The most important single ingredient in the formula of success is the knack of getting along with people. - Theodore Roosevelt

Success is one thing you can't pay for. You buy it on the installment plan and make payments every day. - Zig Ziglar

They say everybody gets 15 minutes. I hope I'm just inside the first minute and the next 14 go really slow. - Terrence Howard

Live with fulfillment, serve with passion so in this lifetime you will have the abillity to die with no regrets. - Randy Gonzales

There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow. - O.S. Marden

All human actions have one or more of these seven causes: chance, nature, compulsions, habit, reason, passion and desire. - Aristotle

The measure of success is not whether you have a tough problem to deal with, but whether it is the same problem you had last year. - John Foster Dulles

What's money? A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do. - Bob Dylan

Today, people struggle to find what's real. Everything has become so synthetic that a lot of people, all they want is to grasp onto hope. - Wyclef Jean

Ego stops you from getting things done and getting people to work with you. That's why I firmly believe that ego and success are not compatible. - Harvey Mackay


The Wurst Spiral I've Seen

Grass Leak

Dead Sea Fish

Jesus On The Beach

NASCAR Fan - Diehard Category

Moldy Bible

Break Dance Soccer

Milk of Amnesia

Foot-Ball

Exhausted Baby

Open Air Wiring

Miss Chernobyl 2004

Fish Lips

Easy Mopping

African Lunch

Structural Books

Honda Boxer Engine

Sick Tombstone

No Drip

Gun Leash

Whole Human

Antler Field

Moon Football

Bike Rack