Redneck Wedding

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - James Thurber

I've seen better fights at a wedding. - Harry Redknapp

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Housewarming: The last call for wedding presents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

She tells enough white lies to ice a wedding cake. - Margot Asquith

An Irish wedding is a tame thing to an Irish funeral. - Mary Deasy

The woman cries before the wedding and the man after. - Polish Proverb

Veiled Threat: When your girlfriend hints at a wedding - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Hand Scanner: Singles bar prowler looking for wedding rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

I'll never forget my wedding day... they threw vitamin pills. - Groucho Marx

A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes. - Joseph Addison

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

A wedding is just like a funeral except that you get to smell your own flowers. - Grace Hansen

I don't follow trends. I make each cake for a particular wedding, or event. - Ron Ben-Israel

You got to have smelt a lot of mule manure before you can sing like a hillbilly. - Hank Williams

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

A wedding anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance and tenacity. The order varies for any given year. - Paul Sweeney

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch." - Phyllis Diller