Redneck Horseshoes

Johnny Cash: A dime for the pay toilet - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Igloo: 1. An icicle built for two; 2. An Alaskan toilet. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Endangered forests are being slaughtered for toilet paper. - Daphne Zuniga

Like toilet paper, laughter is in short supply these days. - Phil Callaway

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

Washable: What a cowboy does, very carefully, with soap and water - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Most of the time he sounds like he has a mouth full of toilet paper. - Rex Reed

Cash Flow: The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

High school is a lot like toilet paper: you only miss it when it's gone. - Unknown

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

France is a country where the money falls apart but you can't tear the toilet paper. - Billy Wilder

Jitterbug: 1. A Scotchman in front of a pay toilet; 2. Insect that's had too much coffee. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet. - Richard M Nixon

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

Unlucky: Crossing the street to avoid walking under a ladder and getting hit by a truck full of horseshoes - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in. - Rita Rudner

Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com