One Glass Per Day

In wine, there is truth. - Pliny the Elder

Good wine needs no vine. - French Proverb

Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

I like a wine that fights back. - John Steed

Gin was mother's milk to her. - George Bernard Shaw

Wine is my favorite 4 letter word. - Unknown

Adventure is the champagne of life. - G K Chesterton

Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder. - Addison Mizner

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown

Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney

Beer: The method of turning grain into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Talking to you is like casting pearls into wine. - Archie Bunker

As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I should never have switched from Scotch to martinis. - Humphrey Bogart

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

There was a sound in their voices which suggested rum. - Robert Louis Sevenson

Bladder: The human apparatus that pays the tax on beer - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The fountain of youth is a mixture of gin and vermouth. - Cole Porter

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. - Benjamin Franklin

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley

I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass. - David Lee Roth

One martini is all right, two is too many, three is not enough. - James Thurber

The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass. - Martin Mull

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

We see through a glass darkly because all we want is to be comfortable. - Ravi Zacharias

A bottle of wine contains more philosophy than all the books in the world. - Louis Pasteur

In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts. - Samuel Johnson

New York champagne - that's a phony label. They don't grow raisins in New York. - Archie Bunker

Happiness. Simple as a glass of chocolate or tortuous as the heart. Bitter Sweet. Alive. - Joanne Harris

My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God women, eat a salad. - Unknown

When a man who is drinking neat gin starts talking about his mother he is past all argument. - C.S. Forester

Jameson's Irish Whiskey really does improve with age: the older I get the more I like it. - Bob Monkhouse

I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.

Keep seeing the glass half-full and it will dawn upon you that it's probably your turn to buy. - Bill Murray

Get thee glass eyes;
And, like a scurvy politician, seem
To see the things thou dost not. - William Shakespeare

When the clergyman's daughter
Drinks nothing but water
She's certain to finish on gin. - Rudyard Kipling

We have embarked upon the world's largest and longest cocktail party, and every issue imaginable is up for grabs. - Geoffrey Moore

There are three words I like to repeat to myself: glass half full. Just to remind myself to be grateful for everything I have. - Goldie Hawn

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke

It's only when you look at an ant through a magnifying glass on a sunny day that you realize how often they burst into flames. - Harry Hill

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron

The night stared me in the face, amorphous, blind, infinite, without frontiers. Not a single start relieved the darkness behind the glass. - Stanisław Lem

If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster