#1 humor site on the 'net

How Much Is That Doggie In The Window?

Canines on the prowl

How Much Is That Doggie In The Window? thanks to Fred Jerant

QuotaBills
Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

Let sleeping dogs lie. - French Proverb

Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker

Dogmatic: Run by canine power. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Sleeping dogs bark the loudest. - Archie Bunker

Never let the tail wag the dog. - Unknown

Dyspupsia: Being sick as a dog. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A hard dog to keep on the porch. - Hillary Clinton

Zit: Command given to a spotted dog - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A hungry dog will eat dirty puddings. - Latin Proverb

An angry dog is best led by its tail. - Unknown

Dogs that bark at a distance never bite. - Unknown

A dog in desperation will leap over a wall. - Unknown

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin

A good bone does not always come to a good dog. - French Proverb

Wok The Dog: Specialty at Vietnamese Restaurants - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Flatterers looks like friends, as wolves like dogs. - George Chapman

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

Properly trained, a man can be dog's best friend. - Corey Ford

Be on your guard against a silent dog and still water. - Latin Proverb

If a man be great, even his dog will ear a proud look. - Japanese Proverb

The scalded dog fears hot water, and afterwards, cold. - Italian Proverb

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. - Steve Wozniak

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash

Colliefornia: The American state that has gone to the dogs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The dog who meets with a good master is the happier of the two. - Maurice Maeterlinck

When the hares have all been caught, the hunting dogs are cooked. - Laozi

If a window of opportunity appears, don't pull down the shade. - Tom Peters

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel

I have nothing against dogs. I just hate rugs that go squish-squish. - Phyllis Diller

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. - Franklin P Jones

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump

Love unlocks doors and opens windows that weren't even there before. - Mignon McLaughlin

There's no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. - Ben Williams

Window: 1. A looking-out glass; 2. Place in the truck to hang your guns. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If you think you have influence, try ordering some else's dog around. - Amish Saying

I'm an emotional eater. When I get upset, my diet goes out the window. - Kelly Osbourne

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

I stuck my head out the window this morning and spring kissed my bang in the face. - Langston Hughes

The story of Easter is the story of God's wonderful window of divine surprise. - Carl Knudsen

Raising boys is like raising puppies. One must take them for a walk every few hours. - Jody Defries

Moving doesn't change who you are. It only changes the view outside your window. - Rachel Hollis

If you fall out of that window and break both your legs, don't come running to me. - Groucho Marx

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

A habit cannot be tossed out the window. It must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time. - Mark Twain

Get a good idea and stay with it. Dog it, and work at it until it's done, and done right. - Walt Disney

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland

Window Screen: 1. A device to prevent the escape of insects; 2. A device for keeping flies in the house. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a chair. - Arnold Toynbee

Don't waste a minute not being happy. If one window closes, run to the next window - or break down a door. - Brooke Shields

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

Trying to predict the future is like trying to drive down a country road at night with no lights while looking out the back window. - Peter F Drucker

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

Snap-On Gasket Scrapper: Theoretically useful as a sandwich tool for spreading mayonnaise; used mainly for getting dog-doo off your boot - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain

Art is the window to man's soul. Without it, he would never be able to see beyond his immediate world; nor could the world see the man within. - Claudia Johnson


Tired Flagpole

Bent Car Sculpture

Cow Jacket

Thanks For Noticing

Overflow Truck Garden

Beach Sign Training

Encouraging Seal

GMC Pool

Nature Calls

You're Home Early

New Nail Gun

Long Noodles

EMS Upgrade

No Pot Of Gold

Graduation Swag

Monkeypox

Pre-Dinner Photography

Curses, Foiled Again

Ant Virus

Sidewalk Malt Melt

Bird's Eye View

Sea Girl

Lifeguard Distancing

Merry Go Motorbike