Happy Keester

Here's looking at you, kid. - Casablanca

I go through life like a Karate Kid. - Britney Spears

I was the kid next door's imaginary friend. - Emo Philips

Eat: What kids do between meals, but not at them - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Goat Herder: A person who likes to work with kids - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Raising kids is a walk in the park. Jurassic Park. - Unknown

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

Juvenile Delinquency: Modern term for what we did as kids - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Any kid will run any errand for you if you ask at bedtime. - Red Skelton

Those have a short Lent who owe money to be paid at Easter. - Benjamin Franklin

I'm Jewish, so I don't know much about Easter eggs. - Simon Kinberg

What do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts. - Homer Simpson

Eros will have naked bodies; Friendship naked personalities. - C S Lewis

If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked? - George Carlin

Easter is meant to be a symbol of hope, renewal, and new life. - Janine di Giovanni

We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley

Dubm Waiter: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Water Hazard: Giving the kids too much to drink before a road trip - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Easter says you can put truth in a grave, but it won't stay there. - Clarence W Hall

Teaching kids to count is fine, but teaching them what counts is best. - Bob Talbert

Raising kids make most people, including me, grow up at least a little. - Madonna

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Joy Of Motherhood: What a woman experiences when all the kids are in bed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn't music. - William Stafford

Unless there is a Good Friday in your life, there can be no Easter Sunday. - Fulton J Sheen

I'm pretty intentional about being highly invested in my kids' lives. - Mark Batterson

For I remember it is Easter morn, and life and love and peace are all new born. - Alice F Palmer

I'm not buying my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did. - Yogi Berra

Spoiled Rotten: What the kids become after as little as 15 minutes with Grandma - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

When a kid says "smell my hand," it almost never smells like cinnamon. - Brian P. Cleary

Show business is my life. When I was a kid I sold insurance, but nobody laughed. - Don Rickles

It's only when the tide goes out that you learn who's been swimming naked. - Warren Buffett

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

My mom used to say that Greek Easter was later because then you get stuff cheaper. - Amy Sedaris

Easter is the demonstration of God that life is essentially spiritual and timeless. - Charles M Crowe

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

I learn things from my kids constantly. Most of their knowledge comes from Snapple caps. - Jimmy Kimmel

I'm so ugly my father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet. - Rodney Dangerfield

If we would listen to our kids, we'd discover that they are largely self-explanatory. - Robert Brault

Christ appeared alive on several occasions after the cataclysmic events of that first Easter. - Josh McDowell

Having kids is the ultimate job in life. I want to be most successful at being a good father. - Nick Lachey

Few Indians only had breech cloths, most being wrapped in buffalo robes, otherwise quite naked. - Zebulon Pike

Golden Age: When the kids are too old to need baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Having a kid is like falling in love for the first time when you're 12, but every single day. - Mike Myers

I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it. - George Burns

Because there is always some kid who may be seeing me for the first or last time, I owe him my best. - Joe DiMaggio

Apparently, as a kid, I used to eat spiders. Maybe there's some Freudian significance behind that. - Matt Smith

No matter how long we've been together Edith, you still, as the kids say, "turn me over." - Archie Bunker

No kid is unsmart. Every kid's a genius at something. Our job is to find it. And then encourage it. - Robin Sharma

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife. - Rodney Dangerfield

All kids are trouble, Edith. And I don't wanna spend my reclining years trying to raise another one. - Archie Bunker

You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby. - Jim Gaffigan

When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out. - Erma Bombeck

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shovelling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller

Here lies my past.
Good-bye I have kissed it;
Thank you, kids.
I wouldn’t have missed it. - Ogden Nash

What if the kid you bullied at school, grew up, and turned out to be the only surgeon who could save your life? - Lynette Mather

As a kid, you looked forward to Charlie Brown during Halloween and you looked forward to Monday Night Football. - Nick Ferguson

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face. - Rodney Dangerfield

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

The Easter egg symbolizes our ability to break out of the hardened, protective shell we've surrounded ourselves with. - Siobhan Shaw

There's no such thing as a soul. It's just something they made up to scare kids, like the bogeyman or Michael Jackson. - Bart Simpson

When I was a kid, one cop could have taken care of the whole neighborhood. Now, one cop wouldn't be safe in the neighborhood. - Mike Royko

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

When it comes to hockey, it's been in my blood since I was 3 or 4 years old. I love coaching the kids, especially at that level. - Mario Lemieux

It goes back to Christianity's affiliation with Judaism as Passover. Easter is as important to Christians as Passover is to the Jews. - Glenn Duffy

I love to play hide and seek with my kid, but some days my goal is to find a hiding place where he can't find me until after high school. - Unknown

If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, 'keep away from children.' - Susan Savannah

Car Pool: Complicated system of transportation where Mom always winds up going the furthest with the biggest bunch of kids who have had the most sugar - Daffynitions joe-ks.com