Barking Up The Wrong Tree

Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

Every dog has his day. - Unknown

Sleeping dogs bark the loudest. - Archie Bunker

A hard dog to keep on the porch. - Hillary Clinton

A hungry dog will eat dirty puddings. - Latin Proverb

I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

Dogs that bark at a distance never bite. - Unknown

He who lies down with dogs, rises with fleas. - English Proverb

Throw physic to the dogs; I'll none of it. - William Shakespeare

Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

The best cure for sea sickness, is to sit under a tree. - Spike Milligan

Anybody who hates dogs and babies can't be all bad. - Leo Rosten

Anyone who hates children and dogs can't be all bad. - WC Fields

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash

Preoccupied with a single leaf you won't see the tree. - Vagabond

The patriot's blood is the seed of Freedom's tree. - Thomas Campbell

I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree. - Joyce Kilmer

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

The dog who meets with a good master is the happier of the two. - Maurice Maeterlinck

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbey

If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of fun out of owning one. - Andrew A. Rooney

Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel

I have nothing against dogs. I just hate rugs that go squish-squish. - Phyllis Diller

I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than a man swear he loves me. - William Shakespeare

It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

The more I see of the representatives of the people, the more I admire my dogs. - Alphonse de Lamartine

How difficult it is to save the bark of reputation from the rocks of ignorance. - Petrarch

Learn not to talk to me. You shake the tree, a leopard's going to fall out. - Kobe Bryant

A dog is the only thing on this earth that loves you more than he loves himself. - Josh Billings

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

Raising boys is like raising puppies. One must take them for a walk every few hours. - Jody Defries

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

Get a good idea and stay with it. Dog it, and work at it until it's done, and done right. - Walt Disney

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. - Robert Benchley

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

I have to tell them that last night was a shameful train wreck filled with blind cuddly puppies. - Charlie Sheen

The difference between a gun and a tree is a difference of tempo. The tree explodes every spring. - Ezra Pound

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown

Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs. - Christopher Hampton

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

Obama and his attack dogs have nothing but hate and anger in their hearts and spew it whenever possible. - Donald Trump

The reason there are so many tree-lined boulevards in Paris is so the German army can march in the shade. - George S Patton

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives. - Sue Murphy

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. - Abraham Lincoln

It's in the democratic citizen's nature to be like a leaf that doesn't believe in the tree it's part of. - David Foster Wallace

You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet. - Hal Borland

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" - probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on. - Woody Allen

Wolves directly affect the entire ecosystem, not just moose populations, their main prey, because less moose equals more tree growth. - Rolf Peterson

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. - Albert Einstein

Dogs laugh, but the laugh with their tails. What puts man in a higher state of evolution is that he has got his laugh on the right end. - Max Eastman

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain

Among God's creatures two, the dog and the guitar, have taken all the sizes and all the shapes, in order not to be separated from the man. - Andres Segovia

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash