#1 humor site on the 'net

Aussie Gentleman

How to speak Aussie

Aussie Gentleman thanks to Phoebe Moll,Raub, North Dakota

Ability is a poor man's wealth. - John Wooden

If a man does his best, what else is there? - George S Patton

Education is the art of making man ethical. - Georg Hegel

Man is born free, and everywhere he is in chains. - Jean-Jacques Rousseau

Lawyers are men who hire out their words and anger. - Martial

No man can think clearly when his fists are clinched. - G.J. Nathan

Lawyers believe a man is innocent until proven broke. - Robin Hall

The woman cries before the wedding and the man after. - Polish Proverb

As a moth gnaws a garment, so doth envy consume a man. - Saint John Chrysostom

Anybody can make history, only a great man can write it. - Oscar Wilde

Men love to wonder, and that is the seed of our science. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A man who is intimate with God is not intimidated by man. - Leonard Ravenhill

Adversity causes some men to break, others to break records. - William A. Ward

A censor is a man who knows more than he thinks you ought to. - Laurence J. Peter

Banking may well be a career from which no man really recovers. - John Kenneth Galbraith

No man needs a vacation so much as the man who has just had one. - Elbert Hubbard

The name of a man is a numbing blow from which he never recovers. - Marshall McLuhan

The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do. - B.F. Skinner

Men fall in love with their eyes. Women fall in love with their ears. - Dr. Phil McGraw

The man with a toothache thinks everyone happy whose teeth are sound. - George Bernard Shaw

A man who wants to lead the orchestra must turn his back on the crowd. - Max Lucado

Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; be strong. - Bible

The General was essentially a man of peace, except in his domestic life. - Oscar Wilde

I am a woman meant for a man, but I never found a man who could compete. - Bette Davis

Man will never reach the moon regardless of all future scientific advances. - Lee De Forest

Thank God men cannot as yet fly and lay waste the sky as well as the earth. - Henry David Thoreau

The wise man should be prepared for everything that does not lie within his control. - Pythagoras

The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it. - Doug Larson

When a man has once loved a woman he will do anything for her except continue to love her. - Oscar Wilde

Being kissed by a man who doesn't wax his moustache is like eating an egg without salt. - Rudyard Kipling

You must be a man of integrity. Never break your word. Don't have two sets of standards. - Red Auerbach

A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there. - Charles Darwin

Man is certainly stark mad. He cannot make a worm, and yet he will be making gods by dozens. - Montaigne

The true republic: men, their rights and nothing more; women, their rights and nothing less. - Franklin P Adams

The way to procure insults is to submit to them: a man meets with no more respect than he exacts. - William Hazlitt

It ain't enough that he's a Pinko and an atheist. You gonna turn him from a man to a morphadite? - Archie Bunker

Except during the nine months before he draws his first breath, no man manages his affairs as well as a tree does. - George Bernard Shaw

I don't want to be the oldest performer in captivity. I don't want to look like a little old man dancing out there. - Fred Astaire

To do the useful thing, to say the courageous thing, to contemplate the beautiful thing: that is enough for one man's life. - T S Eliot

I had very good dentures once. Some magnificent gold work. It's the only form of jewelry a man can wear that women fully appreciate. - Graham Greene

Rosella Ring

Orthodox Weapon

Antler Car

Wicked Stawm

Dementia Relations

Church Karma

The End in Canada

Sign Slippage

Obedient Wives

Symptoms of Laziness

Hog Hunter

Sea Horse

Impossible Object

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Blinker Fluid

Dutch Rollerblades

Goat Tree

Mind The Pedestrians

Trapped in the 5th Dimension

Job Retraining

Wet Floor Caution

Chef Multitasking

Camera Waterfall

Irony Pin