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Future Corrections Officer

Where playground security takes bottom priority

Future Corrections Officer thanks to Martin Grosse

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Thank God kids never mean well. - Lily Tomlin

I love shark week, all kids swim for free. - Josh Stern

Germs: The only things kids will share freely - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Just pray for a tough hide and a tender heart. - Ruth Graham

Don't hide your scars. They make who you are. - Frank Sinatra

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

Follow your inner moonlight; don't hide the madness. - Allen Ginsberg

Kids are life's only guaranteed bona fide upside surprise. - Jack Nicholson

We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Silence is golden unless you have kids. Then silence is just suspicious. - Unknown

Joy Of Motherhood: What a woman experiences when all the kids are in bed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn't music. - William Stafford

I'm pretty intentional about being highly invested in my kids' lives. - Mark Batterson

All kids need is a little help, a little hope, and somebody who believes in them. - Earvin "Magic" Johnson

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

Police: The only people who are paid to go around pinching people in the wrong places - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your girlfriend. - Jack Nicholson

A police force, wherever they are, is made up of amazing people, and I respect them a great deal. - Nancy McKeon

I just want to make sure when I have kids, I can spend time with them. That's the whole point. - Mark Zuckerberg

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

No matter how long we've been together Edith, you still, as the kids say, "turn me over." - Archie Bunker

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest. - Kin Hubbard

Women are like the police. They could have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession. - Chris Rock

Here lies my past.
Good-bye I have kissed it;
Thank you, kids.
I wouldn’t have missed it. - Ogden Nash

My life was going to flash before my eyes, but it decided to hide behind my eyes and quake with terror instead. - Sarah Rees Brennan

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

I'm being kidnapped by a comforter, sheet and pillow. No need to call the police for I will be released by morning. - Unknown

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

There's no such thing as a soul. It's just something they made up to scare kids, like the bogeyman or Michael Jackson. - Bart Simpson

It's the generally accepted privilege of theologians to stretch the heavens, that is the Scriptures, like tanners with a hide. - Desiderius Erasmus

I think our police are excellent, probably because I have not done anything that has occasioned being beaten up by these good men. - Clement Freud

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to hell? - Homer Simpson

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer

When you have police officers who abuse citizens, you erode public confidence in law enforcement. That makes the job of good police officers unsafe. - Mary F Berry

One of the fondest expressions around is that we can't be the world's policeman. But guess who gets called when suddenly someone needs a cop. - Colin Powell


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