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Future Corrections Officer

Where playground security takes bottom priority

Future Corrections Officer thanks to Martin Grosse

QuotaBills
I love shark week, all kids swim for free. - Josh Stern

Don't hide your scars. They make who you are. - Frank Sinatra

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

The police must obey the law while enforcing the law. - Earl Warren

Kids don't remember their best day of television. - Unknown

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

If at first you do succeed, try to hide your astonishment. - Harry Banks

Kids are life's only guaranteed bona fide upside surprise. - Jack Nicholson

It is a great ability to be able to conceal one's ability. - Duc de La Rochefoucauld

I have fallen in love with someone who is hiding inside of you. - Hafiz

We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for sex. - Bill Maher

Try as you may to hide, you can never contain the beauty of your Soul. - Cheryl lee Harnish

Raising kids make most people, including me, grow up at least a little. - Madonna

Silence is golden unless you have kids. Then silence is just suspicious. - Unknown

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any. - Fred Astaire

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? - George Carlin

This is good news... If the Persians hide the sun, we shall do battle in the shade. - Herodotus

Hopefully, kids realize you can do anything you want. Skateboarding can be that gateway. - Ryan Sheckler

A rich person should leave his kids enough to do something, but not enough to do nothing. - Warren Buffet

If we would listen to our kids, we'd discover that they are largely self-explanatory. - Robert Brault

There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your girlfriend. - Jack Nicholson

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

No matter how long we've been together Edith, you still, as the kids say, "turn me over." - Archie Bunker

You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby. - Jim Gaffigan

One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman

Here lies my past.
Good-bye I have kissed it;
Thank you, kids.
I wouldn’t have missed it. - Ogden Nash

It used to take me all vacation to grow a new hide in place of the one they flogged off me during school term. - Mark Twain

I love to go to a movie, get a Diet Coke and a barrel of popcorn, and sit there with my kids and watch a film. - William Shatner

My life was going to flash before my eyes, but it decided to hide behind my eyes and quake with terror instead. - Sarah Rees Brennan

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

There's no such thing as a soul. It's just something they made up to scare kids, like the bogeyman or Michael Jackson. - Bart Simpson

You know your kids are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going. - P.J. O'Rourke

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to hell? - Homer Simpson

If you want your kids to listen to you, don't yell at them. Whisper. Make them lean in. My kids taught me that. I do it with adults now. - Mario Batali

Fang took the entire family out for coffee and donuts the other night. The kids enjoyed it. It was the first time they'd ever given blood. - Phyllis Diller

One of the fondest expressions around is that we can't be the world's policeman. But guess who gets called when suddenly someone needs a cop. - General Colin Powell


Orthodox Weapon

Antler Car

Wicked Stawm

Dementia Relations

Church Karma

The End in Canada

Sign Slippage

Obedient Wives

Symptoms of Laziness

Hog Hunter

Sea Horse

Impossible Object

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Blinker Fluid

Dutch Rollerblades

Goat Tree

Mind The Pedestrians

Trapped in the 5th Dimension

Job Retraining

Wet Floor Caution

Chef Multitasking

Camera Waterfall

Irony Pin

Cellfies