Either The Cat or Husband Goes

A meowing cat catches no mice. - Yiddish proverb

International Spade The Cat Week - Archie Bunker

These are cathedrals of shopping. - Emile Zola

Meow means "woof" in cat. - George Carlin

When the cat dies, the mice rejoice. - African saying

A good husband is healthy and absent. - Japanese Proverb

When the cat's away, the mice will play. - French Proverb

A cat bitten once by a snake dreads even rope. - Arab Proverb

A man without a smiling face should not open a shop. - Chinese Proverb

Crying is for plain women. Pretty women go shopping. - Oscar Wilde

I always say shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist. - Tammy Faye Bakker

A shop should be like a song of which you never tire. - Harry Gordon Selfridge

The kind man feeds his cat before sitting down to dinner. - Hebrew Proverb

The quickest way to know a woman is to go shopping with her. - Marcelene Cox

Traditional methods of sales prospecting are grossly inefficient. - Jill Konrath

Do you Edith....take Archie Bunker to be your lawfully bedded husband? - Archie Bunker

The most popular labor-saving device today is still a husband with money. - Joey Adams

The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it's always a cat. - Ogden Nash

When rats infest the palace, a lame cat is better than the swiftest horse. - Chinese Proverb

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere. - Groucho Marx

Someone told me that each equation I included in the book would halve the sales. - Stephen Hawking

I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up. - Rodney Dangerfield

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back. - Will Rogers

I'm so ugly I worked in a pet shop, and people kept asking how big I'd get. - Rodney Dangerfield

Having a baby is like falling in love again, both with your husband and your child. - Tina Brown

If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man, but deteriorate the cat. - Mark Twain

My husband and I fell in love at first sight. Maybe I should have taken a second look. - Mia Farrow

Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping. - Bo Derek

Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love, though I'd stepped in it a few times. - Rita Rudner

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said, "Cigarettes contain fat." - Dave Barry

My husband always felt that a marriage and career don't mix. That's why he's never worked. - Phyllis Diller

My husband and I have figured out a really good system about the housework: neither one of us does it. - Dottie Archibald

I've known and respected your husband for many years, and what's good enough for him is good enough for me. - Groucho Marx

I will be deafer than the blue-eyed cat, And thrice as blind as any noonday owl, To holy virgins in their ecstasies. - Lord Alfred Tennyson

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

People shop and learn in a whole new way compared to just a few years ago, so marketers need to adapt or risk extinction. - Brian Halligan

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

When one may pay out over two million dollars to presidential and Congressional campaigns, the U.S. government is virtually up for sale. - John W. Gardner

I hate smart sales clerks. I said to one, "What do you have in lingerie?" She says, "More than you'll ever have!" - Phyllis Diller

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer