Before Morning Coffee

Has Beans: Used coffee grounds - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Dyspupsia: Being sick as a dog. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Coffee and love taste best when hot. - German Proverb

When the cat dies, the mice rejoice. - African saying

An angry dog is best led by its tail. - Unknown

Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks? - Steven Wright

You can't teach a young dog old tricks. - Warren Buffett

If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. - Harry S Truman

A cat is a puzzle for which there is no solution. - Hazel Nicholson

One trained dog equals 60 search-and-rescue workers. - Charles Stoehr

I'll get you, my pretty, and your little dog, too! - The Wizard of Oz

The kind man feeds his cat before sitting down to dinner. - Hebrew Proverb

I think if I were a woman I'd wear coffee as a perfume. - John Van Druten

Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank. - Alphonse Allais

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

The dog who meets with a good master is the happier of the two. - Maurice Maeterlinck

If the cat sits long enough at the hole, it will catch the mouse. - Irish proverb

Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten

A lame cat is better than a swift horse when rats infest the palace. - Chinese Proverb

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time. - Steven Wright

There's no need for a piece of sculpture in a home that has a cat. - Wesley Bates

I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

If you think you have influence, try ordering some else's dog around. - Amish Saying

The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it's always a cat. - Ogden Nash

If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way. - Mark Twain

I am obsessed with Costco. I love the salmon and rotisserie chicken, the dog beds. - Kris Jenner

If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man, but deteriorate the cat. - Mark Twain

It's amazing how the world begins to change through the eyes of a cup of coffee. - Donna A Favors

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes. - Lewis Grizzard

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

Get a good idea and stay with it. Dog it, and work at it until it's done, and done right. - Walt Disney

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx

I'm suspicious of people who don't like dogs, but I trust a dog when it doesn't like a person. - Unknown

Ever wonder where you'd end up if you took your dog for a walk and never once pulled back on the leash? - Robert Brault

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

Fang took the entire family out for coffee and donuts the other night. The kids enjoyed it. It was the first time they'd ever given blood. - Phyllis Diller

Among God's creatures two, the dog and the guitar, have taken all the sizes and all the shapes, in order not to be separated from the man. - Andres Segovia

Blind dates are treacherous. You don't know who this person is. You wonder, "Should I call my grandma during coffee to get out of this?" - Alan Alda