Annual Meeting of Women Drivers

Shopping is my cardio. - Carrie Bradshaw

Women's word is never done. - American Proverb

Successful Woman: One who finds such a man - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Behind every good woman is a lot of chocolate. - Unknown

Women speak two languages, one of which is verbal. - Steve Rubenstein

He speaks to me as though I were a public meeting. - Queen Victoria

Jade: A semi-precious stone or a semi-precious woman - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I pay very heavy semi-annual premiums 4 times a year. - Archie Bunker

Chaos: Three women discussing the two sides of an issue - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I only take Viagra when I'm with more than one woman. - Jack Nicholson

A woman can say more in a sigh than a man can say in a sermon. - Arnold Haultain

I've kissed so many women I can do it with my eyes closed. - Henny Youngman

Behind every successful man is a woman. Behind her is his wife. - Groucho Marx

How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them. - Groucho Marx

I wouldn't be caught dead marrying a woman old enough to be my wife. - Tony Curtis

The test of a man or woman's breeding is how they behave in a quarrel. - George Bernard Shaw

Here's to strong women. May we know them. May we be them. May we raise them. - Unknown

Enthusiasm is a vital element toward the individual success of every man or woman. - Conrad Hilton

This woman was so cross-eyed. She can go to a tennis match and never move her head. - Phyllis Diller

The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby. - Mary Marsh

Marketers need to build digital relationships and reputation before closing a sale. - Chris Brogan

No honest work of man or woman "fails"; it feeds the sum of all human action. - Michelene Wandor

A man who moralizes is usually a hypocrite, and a woman who moralizes is usually plain. - Oscar Wilde

The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is. - Helen Rowland

My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God women, eat a salad. - Unknown

Many a woman has a past, but I am told that she has at least a dozen, and that they all fit. - Oscar Wilde

It is easier for a woman to defend her virtue against men than her reputation against women. - French Proverb

If you're not paying for it through the health plan, you pay for it in the emergency room. - David Lehman

I went to a garage sale. "How much for the garage?" "It's not for sale." - Steven Wright

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

Deprived of meaningful work, men and women lose their reason for existence; they go stark, raving mad. - Fyodor Dostoevsky

A woman should cleave into her husband. Right here in this house is where Edith's cleavage belongs. - Archie Bunker

A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. - Enid Bagnold

No matter how plain a woman may be, if truth and honesty are written across her face, she will be beautiful. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Women are the most powerful magnet in the universe. And all men are cheap metal. And we all know where north is. - Larry Miller

Men prefer brief praise, pitched high; women are satisfied with praise in a lower key, just so it goes on and on - Mignon McLaughlin

Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed. - Albert Einstein

I wanted to be the first woman to burn her bra, but it would have taken the fire department four days to put it out. - Dolly Parton

Except for a few guitar chords, everything I've learned in my life that is of any value I've learned from women. - Glenn Frey

Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots. - Hoosier Farmer