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Kids Rids
You're Kid'n me, right?


 
 
What type of fruit has a built-in bed?
 
What do you call an instruction manual for ventriloquists?
 
When do cows use doorbells?
 
What do moose read in the morning?
 
Did you hear about the constipated musician?
 
If a truck horn goes 'toot-toot', what goes 'toot suite'?
 
Why are bunnies so good at math?
 
How do you stop a rhinoceros from charging?
 
What do you call a horse behind bars?
 
Why did the man put the trout on a plane?
 
Why is the banana so popular?
 
Where do cars get the most flat tires?
 
What problem do you get from eating too much?
 
Why are locksmiths such good singers?
 
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
 
What is a ringleader?
 
Why did the cannibal join the police force?
 
What do you use in a jungle birthday cake?
 
What do you call an unexciting pig?
 
Why did the waiter always win at tennis?
 
What sizes do skunks come in?
 
Why was the student's report card wet?
 
What does a pig do after school?
 
How can you recognize crazy rabbit stew?
 
What do vampires eat at a baseball game?
 
What do you call an Indian who doesn't laugh much?
 
Why couldn't anyone play cards on the Ark?
 
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
 
What kind of stories do little horses read in kindergarten?
 
What's the difference between a bird and a fly?
 
Which letter of the alphabet is always drunk?
 
If you feed a cow on hundred dollar bills, what will you get?
 
What do puppies like to ride in?
 
How do you know that Edgar Allan Poe didn't have money?
 
What is the capital of Canada?
 
Why is a drama teacher like the Pony Express?
 
How does Robin Hood get from here to there?
 
What's the most important lesson you learn in chemistry class?
 
Why was the Tupperware salesman ruled out as a murder suspect?
 
What happens to your toes when your foot falls asleep?
 
What do you get when you squeeze a curtain?
 
Why didn't the cannibal want to go to the crematorium for lunch?
 
What do you call a snake that drinks too much coffee?
 
What do English country gentlemen do on Saturday nights?
 
Why did the Dalai Lama go to Las Vegas?
 
Why did the cowardly vampire go hungry?
 
Why is a clergyman like a shoemaker?
 
Why didn't the window have any money?
 
What did one flea say to the other flea?
 
What fruit will never run away and get married?
 
What do you get when you cross a quilt with peanut butter?
 
Where are mashed potatoes buried?
 
What do cats read?
 
What bear loves to wash his hair?
 
What do you get if you cross a fish with Dutch cheese?
 
Which insect knows the most about computers?
 
What is a bird's favourite game?
 
Is it better to do your homework on a full or empty stomach?
 
How did the police know the blacksmith's signature was a fake?
 
What do you get when you cross Darth Vader's son with a hamburger?
 
What's a good remedy for squeaky infants?
 
How can you get in touch with a fish?
 
What do you call a pig's laundry?
 
What do you get when you eat a lollipop that has a mosquito on it?
 
What did the syrup call her sweetheart?
 
What does illegal mean?
 
What sits on the bottom of the sea and shakes?
 
Why did the blueberry need a lawyer?
 
Where do spies do their shopping?
 
Where does imitation leather come from?
 
Did you hear back from the man who just sold you the Nile River?
 
What's purple and surrounded by water?
 
What vegetable keeps the best musical rhythm?
 
Who was the first couple to study science?
 
What did the audience do when the comedian bent over too far?
 
Why shouldn't you tell secrets when a clock is around?
 
Where do cows go on vacation?
 
What kind of skates wear out quickly?
 
What do you call a worker called Richard with a road roller on his head?
 
What do you call a woman who has one leg shorter than the other?
 
What do you call a mechanic with a car on his head?
 
What do you call a worker without a shovel on his head?
 
What do cobras like best about going to the movies?
 
What did the bankrupt skunk say?
 
What do Indians use to catch frogs?
 
What does a magician say when he takes a picture?
 
How did the scientist invent bug spray?
 
What did E.T.'s mother say to him when he got home?
 
What did one arithmetic book say to another?
 
How did the bird with a broken wing land safely?
 
What always gets wet while it's drying?
 
Why is gossip like a kiss?
 
Why was the giraffe slow to apologize?
 
Where do Martians leave their spaceships?
 
Why was the crab arrested?
 
What is a myth?
 
If cows get milked, what do goats get?
 
What's full of holes but can hold water?
 
What cake wanted to rule the world?
 
What do you call a clock in space?
 
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29-Jul-2016

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