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Kids Rids
You're Kid'n me, right?


 
 
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?
 
What did the lobster give his teacher?
 
What do cows do best in driver's ed?
 
What did the pig put in the school computer?
 
What did the turtles say to the teacher?
 
What did the dancing teacher call her dancing sibling?
 
What did the football coach take with him on his fishing trip?
 
What do you call a school where all the students are over six feet tall?
 
What do you call a boy who can subtract, multiply, and divide, but can't add?
 
What do history teachers make when they want to get together?
 
What English King invented the fireplace?
 
What does a sick preacher take?
 
Why was the math book sad?
 
How do you know if a fly is a great American football player?
 
What position did the pig play in football?
 
Where did the goblin throw the football?
 
Where do they serve snacks to football players?
 
What do you call a football player who keeps giving up?
 
Which part of a football stadium never stays the same?
 
Why were the charges against the football team dropped?
 
Why was the cannibal suspended?
 
Why was the alphabet tired out?
 
Did you hear about the depressed prisoner?
 
Bubba, name the constituents of quartz.
 
Is a hammer useful in math?
 
What do you tell someone you didn't see on New Year's Eve?
 
What do vampires sing on New Year's Eve?
 
What happened when the steam hammer was invented?
 
What do earth science students weigh themselves on?
 
What is an octopus?
 
What is a forum?
 
What two letters are used by the elves to describe Santa's bag the day after Christmas?
 
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
 
What nationality is Santa Claus?
 
What do you get if you deep fry Santa Claus?
 
What is Santa's favourite Easter candy?
 
What is a Jehovah Witness's favourite Christmas song?
 
Who is never hungry at Christmas?
 
How do sheep greet each other at Christmas?
 
What's the best thing to put into a Christmas cake?
 
Why did Santa spell Christmas N-O-E?
 
How do cats greet each other at Christmas?
 
What do you get if you cross an apple with a Christmas Tree?
 
Which of Santa's reindeer needs to mind his manners the most?
 
What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmas time?
 
What did Santa say to Mrs. Claus as he looked out the window?
 
What did the guest sing at the Eskimo Christmas Party?
 
What are Christmas trees like bad knitters?
 
What did the ghost say to Santa Claus?
 
What do Santa's beard and a Christmas tree have in common?
 
What do you call an ice skating goalie who skips school?
 
What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve?
 
Who delivers presents to good little baby kittens at Christmas?
Christmas for Kids
 
When the cow crossed the road on Christmas what did he say?
 
Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve?
 
How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas?
 
What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective?
 
What do you call a man who works in a perfume shop at Christmas?
 
What did Santa shout to his toys on Christmas Eve?
 
How does Rudolf know when Christmas is coming?
 
How do you make a Moroff laugh on Boxing Day?
 
Who sings "Love me tender", and makes Christmas toys?
 
Why do you go to bed on Christmas Eve?
 
What sickness do you get when you're tired of school?
 
What did the lumberjack's wife say to him?
 
What kind of school does Sherlock Holmes attend?
 
What college do vines go to?
 
How can you tell when a swimming team is broke?
 
Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
 
How did the teacher handle a class full of baby goats?
 
How did Darth Vader's parents get him to study?
 
How was the cooking class performance?
 
How do you recognize math plants?
 
What ballet outfit do math teachers wear?
 
What do mountain climbers' kids like to play?
 
What kind of geometric shape keeps falling apart?
 
What happened when the investor put all his money into erasers?
 
What exercise makes you miss school?
 
What tables don't you have to learn?
 
Why did the tomato blush?
 
Did you hear about the computer that died?
 
What famous nurse rarely got dressed in the morning?
 
What did Mr. Yo-Yo say to Ms. Top?
 
Why did Julius Caesar buy crayons?
 
Why did the cat take a computer course?
 
Why did the computer go to the school cafeteria?
 
Why did the cabbie rush to school?
 
Why did the cow quit school?
 
What does a nut say when it sneezes?
 
What's the most educated room in the house?
 
What is it that we find so easy to get into and so hard to get out of?
 
What letter comes after "A"?
 
What's the difference between a bird watcher and a bad speller?
 
Where do geologists go to relax?
 
What did the chiropractor take at the end of his studies?
 
What did the billboard learn at school?
 
What course talks about hamburgers?
 
What did the computer do at lunchtime?
 
What do you get when you cross a mouth with a tornado?
 
What do you call a great phys ed teacher?
 
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