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Kids Rids
You're Kid'n me, right?


 
 
Why did the man mail his friend a clock?
 
Where do otters come from?
 
What do you call 2 boys hanging from the ceiling?
 
What do dogs put on their pizza?
 
What kind of haircut does a bee get?
 
What's the first thing you need to split an atom?
 
What do you call a man with a car on his head?
 
What are the small rivers that run into the Nile?
 
How do you clear ice off the windows of tall buildings?
 
What did the tennis team write for the school paper?
 
What club do fish like to join?
 
Why do women live longer than men?
 
Where does a pig leave its car when it takes the train?
 
What's the best way to make sure you always remember your wife's birthday?
 
Did you hear about the absent-minded Siamese twins?
 
In what school do you have to drop out before you graduate?
 
What did the lobster major in at the police academy?
 
What goes "ring, ring" every morning at the wrong time?
 
What did the leopard say to his friends in the school cafeteria?
 
Why did the captain go to college?
 
Where do furniture polishers get their education?
 
Where do sleepy students carry their books?
 
Why did everyone think the English teacher was very old?
 
Why did the mailman take the alphabet?
 
What is the favourite sermon of the painter-turned-pastor?
 
What did the fish do in music class?
 
What did the ruler say to the pencil?
 
What do you get when you cross the English department with the school cafeteria?
 
What do porcupines write their reports with?
 
What do you get when you cross a class clown with Mr. Spock?
 
What do pigs do after school?
 
What kind of joe-ks did Einstein like?
 
What do construction workers play with in kindergarten?
 
What must you pay to get to school?
 
What team cries when it loses?
 
What snack did the computer laptop have?
 
What type of math do pilots study?
 
What's a parrot's best subject?
 
Why did the farmer go to school?
 
Why did the pool player ruin the school play?
 
Why did the locomotive go to the gym?
 
Why did the student glue himself to his report?
 
What college courses do veterinarians take?
 
How was the driving teacher's parking?
 
How did the science teacher quiz her students?
 
How far can you go in astronomy?
 
How many policemen does it take to change a light bulb?
 
What happened to the student who swallowed a dictionary?
 
What's the most important thing about 18th Century scientists?
 
When gym teachers take planes, what class do they travel in?
 
Why do seagulls live near the sea?
 
What are Arctic cows called?
 
What do slugs pack when they go on a trip?
 
Which squid is the friendliest?
 
What is the hardest thing about learning to skate?
 
What do you call a cow that can't give milk?
 
Why do dogs run in circles?
 
What do you call a baby turkey?
 
What do vampires eat at parties?
 
What does a button do?
 
Which side of a chicken has the most feathers?
 
What insect plays music?
 
Why can't you tell pigs your secrets?
 
What kind of food does a racehorse eat?
 
How do skunks know when to release their terrible smell?
 
Why does an elephant never forget?
 
How do you make a hot dog stand?
 
A class has a top and a bottom. What is in the middle?
 
What happened to the plant in math class?
 
What do you call a pig who doesn't do anything all day?
 
What do you call a very small Valentine?
 
Why did the boy jump up and down on his Valentine card?
 
What did the little boy bat say to his Valentine?
 
Why did the cannibal break up with his Valentine?
 
What did the boy bear say to the girl bear on Valentine's Day?
 
Why do skunks celebrate Valentine's Day?
 
What did the boy whale say to the girl whale on Valentine's Day?
 
How did the Vampire call his sweetheart on Valentine's Day?
 
What did the boy bird sing to the girl bird on Valentine's Day?
 
What did the boy cat say to the girl cat on Valentine's Day?
 
What did the boy sheep say to the girl sheep on Valentine's Day?
 
What did the boy snake say to the girl snake on Valentine's Day?
 
What did the boy owl say to the girl owl on Valentine's Day?
 
What did the boy rabbit say to the girl rabbit on Valentine's Day?
 
What did the girl bee say to the boy bee on Valentine's Day?
 
What did the boy bee say to the girl bee on Valentine's Day?
 
What did the boy drum say to the girl drum on Valentine's Day?
 
What did the pork chop say to the steak on Valentine's Day?
 
What did the farmer give his wife on Valentine's Day?
 
What did the caveman give his wife on Valentine's Day?
 
What did the boy pickle say to the girl pickle on Valentine's Day?
 
What do you get if you pull your pants up to your neck?
 
What do squirrels give each other for Valentine's Day?
 
What did the French chef give his wife on Valentine's Day?
 
What did the man who loves his car do on February 14th?
 
Why should you send your sweetheart a valentine on Valentine's Day?
 
Where does Valentine's Day come after Easter?
 
What did the boy lightbulb to the girl lightbulb on Valentine's Day?
 
What did the girl lightbulb to the boy lightbulb on Valentine's Day?
 
Why were the cannibals sick after eating the missionary?
 
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