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Business Joe-ks
joe-ks.com
Largest Source of Internet Humour!
I went to a general store. They wouldn't let me buy anything specifically.
“If
at first you don't succeed, redefine success.”
“If at
first you don't succeed, then skydiving isn't for you.”
“Sacred
cows make the best hamburger.”
“The
higher a monkey climbs, the more you can see of its ass.”
“The
longer the title, the less important the job.”
“A
committee can make a decision that is dumber than any of its members.”
“The
easier it is to do, the harder it is to change.”
“Avoid
the concrete promise… and cultivate the delightfully vague.”
“The
man who can smile when things go wrong has thought of someone he can blame it
on.”
“Second-rate
people hire third-rate people.”
“Something
happens to a man when he puts on a necktie. It cuts off all the oxygen to his
brain.”
“Those
who rise to executive positions lack the qualifications for anything lower.”
“The
usefulness of any meeting is inversely proportional to the size of the group.”
“If
you send someone 'Styrofoam', how do you pack it?”
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
“The
President, who has been sick for several days, is now in bed with a coed.”
Manicurist: A girl who makes money hand over fist.
“Only
dead fish swim with the stream.”
How to explain your archaic business processes...
You’ve got to be original, because if you’re like someone else, what do they
need you for?
“Executive
ability in your makeup will lead you to success...”
Business: The art of redefining honesty, fair dealing and acceptable profits.
Business: Something which, if you don't have any, you go out of.
How do fish go into business?
CEO: Corporate Ego in Overdrive.
Merger: When 1+1=1, with the remainder going on unemployment.
Monkey Business: A swinging corporation.
Publicity: The art of putting the best feat forward.
If at first you don't succeed, try management.
The speed of the leader determines the rate of the pack.
Going On Business: Sightseeing and eating with a dull session in the middle.
(click on the thumbnail images below to
expand to full size)
Dollar Drop

UK Credit Crunch

Heart Attack Grill

Warm Sweater

When Life Gets You Down

Leave Toes Outside

Copy & Paste Twins

Lean Two Transportation

Hanging Load

Legal Grounds

Demo House For Sale

Construction SNAFU Awards

Cat Salesman Of The Year

Up-Set & Hungry Trucks
 
Snake Leather

Study to Fail

Sushi To Go

Redneck Moving Company

Used Cows For Sale

Revolutionary Cooking

Fly in the Toilet

Hurricane Protection

Puzzle Ad

USB Vacuum Cleaner

Dike Strengthening

Pet Shoe

Pool Painters

Reaching Out Too Far

Annoying People

New Energy Source

Cheap House Siding

Portable GPS

Gas Prices Around The World

Freight Train Graffiti

Water On Steps

Redneck Mansion

Master Reference Binder

Benefits of High Gas Prices

Latte Art

Balloon Clothing

Irish Exam

Half House For Sale

Monkeying Around

Underwater Photography

BraPod

Geek Gravestone

Texas Hunting Vehicle

2008 Cereal

Gizmo Gadgets
  
Dyslexic Camper

Home In A Box

Portable Office

Cell Phone Booth

Proof of Global Warming

Cliff Side Camping

www: Wagtail Windscreen Wiper

Diet Water

Alternative to Elevators

IRS Middle Class Pencil Sharpener

PMS Center

Wise Electricity Use

Volvo Bike

Surf Lessons

Gateway To Obesity

Bed For Blondes

Electricity Storage

First Computer

Bumper Bike

High Withdrawals

Put On A Happy Face

Hair Growth - a Sign of the Times

Eyekon Camera

Car Stool

Daily Inspiration

Overloaded Mailbox

Wine Gum Lamp

Yoga Leadership

Portable Auto Body Shop

Spot the Hidden Cell Tower

Crossed Wires

MicroMac

Harley Outsourcing Strategy
(2.3M)

Redneck GPS

Gopher's Phone Booth

High Tide Heels

Gas Financing

Tampax Protection

No Time For Stamps

Sky Board Easel

IRS Toothpaste

Revenue Canada Simplified 2007
Tax Form

Skylines of the World

Back Peddling Violinist

Water Taxi

Creative Clothing

Giant Slingshot

New York's Morning Cup of Java

Swimming Pool For Sale - House
Not Included

Romantic Table

Sandal Sale

Bathroom Browser - TP Printer

Keyboard Technology - Old Meets
New

Hang On To That Thought

Spot the Thief

The Honey Truck

Practical Error Messages

Stepping Up In The World

One Square Meal A Day

Roller Coaster Escalator

Canadian Beer Box Computer

Fencing Down Under

Last Day On The Job

Catalogue Shopping

Save A Tree

Yoga Pencil

Classic Ballet Ad

Pond Management

How To Hire Engineers

Hair Ad - Just Add Self

@ Internet - The Place 2B
12
Days of Christmas - Cost of True Love for 2004
12
Days of Christmas - Economizing Measures
12 Days of Christmas - Gifts By Mail
12 Who Wouldn't
1880 Stage Coach Warning to Passengers
1907 to 2007: Century of Change
1923 Leaders
and Losers
1943 Guide to Hiring Women
1954 Vision of the 2004 "Home Computer"
1st Static Electricity-Powered Home (3.1M)
2003: Changing Priorities
Ahead
2003 Org Chart Strategy
2005 California State Employee Handbook (430k)
2006 Massive Tax Refund (260k)
2007 Ford Shelby GR1 Concept Car
2008 Cereal

2008 Rush Job Calendar

2010 Vancouver Winter Olympics – Unannounced Program
401K Plan - Privatizing Social Security
5 Dollars of Gas
A Face A Day - Preparing For Work
A Free Ride: $10 is $10!
A Horse's Ass IS Important
A Three-Hour Work Day?
Aardvark Marriage Insurance
Acceptable Doctors Sign
Accountant Defined
Achieving More At Work – Better Management Styles
ACHTUNG!
Administratium - Heaviest Element
Discovered
Advantages of Using The Company Car
Advertisement Potpourri
After Easter Bunny
After-Gas Piggy Bank
Air Canada Baggage Delivery
Air Poland's Inaugural Flight - New Design for Air Canada?
Air Traffic Control-Her
Alarm Company's 'Remote' Security
(4.1M)
Alcohol Research
All Over It
(1.0M)

Alternate Uses For Brand Name Products
Alternative Theory of Organizational Structure
Alternative to Elevators
Amended
Company Travel Policy
Anagrams 4U: Words, Phrases & Business Terms
Anger
Management Suppository Bullets
Animal Halloween Costumes
Annoying Little Bars Of Soap
Annoying People

Another Wasted Meeting?
Answering Machine Messages
Anti-Theft Car
Anti-Theft Car Device
Antique Regifting
AOL's Password Protection
Apple Car
April 5, 2006: Special Hundred-Year Date
Artist Appreciation
Asking
For A Pay Raise
Asian Real Meal Deal
Aspiring Accountant
Aussie Husband Wanted - Call Helen
Australia 101 For Tourists
Auto Warranty: New Extend-ed Coverage
Automatic
Flattery - Give Yourself Some Recognition
Automatic Salary Review (25k)
Avoiding Stress In The Workplace
Awning Truck Advertising - Display What You Sell
Baby Delivery
Baby Names - Based On Profession (320k)
Back Peddling Violinist
'Back' To Work
Backpack or Goat Pack?
Back-To-Work Mondays - Grin & Bear It (280k)
Bacon Bike
Bad English Translations on International Signs
Bad Hair Day
Bag Hang-Up
Baker's
Special Deal
Balloon Advertising for Exploding Results
Balloon Clothing

Bank of Newfie Scotia ATM Instructions
Barcode Eyelashes
Barcode for a Lifetime of
Laughter!
Baseball Chair
Baseball Sickness
Basketball Car
Bathroom Browser - TP Printer
BBC
Rejection Letter - Web Producer Position
Bean Bag Office (1.1M)
Bed For Blondes
Beer Besting
Bend-But-Don't Break On The Mountain Top
Benefits of High Gas Prices

The Best Advice
Best Baseball Player
Best Casino Ad
(1.1M)

Bier Making Oudfit -
Balancin Schtatement
Big Man In A Small Town
Big Rocks First
Bike Chaser
Bill Gates Car
BillGatus of Borg - Resistance is
Futile
Bird Flu Prevention
Blah, Blah, Blah Speaker
Blind Bunny
Blonde Boss's Typing Paper
Blonde Car Sale
Blonde File Clerk |