Afghan Humour

The Taliban’s national bird


Q: How do you play Taliban bingo?
A: B-52...F-16...B-1...

Q: What is the Taliban’s national bird?
A: Duck

Q: How is Bin Laden like Fred Flintstone?
A: Both may look out their windows and see Rubble.

Q: Why does the Afghanistan Navy have glass bottom boats?
A: So they can see their Air Force.

Q: What do Osama Bin Laden and General Custer have in common?
A: They both want to know where those Tomahawks are coming from.

Q: Why aren’t there any Wal-Marts in Afghanistan?
A. Because there’s a Target on every corner.


QuotaBills
An army marches on its stomach. - Napoleon Bonaparte

I want to paint the way a bird sings. - Claude Monet

A gun gives you the body, not the bird. - Henry David Thoreau

Look at you, you're white as a goat. - Archie Bunker

Skill and confidence are an unconquered army. - George Herbert

The army is the true nobility of our country. - Napoleon III

People will exceed targets they set themselves. - Gordon Dryden

The bird a nest, the spider a web, man friendship. - William Blake

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms. - Groucho Marx

I now close my military career and just fade away. - Douglas MacArthur

In sports, every day you can be the hero or the goat. - Geoff Stults

The early bird gets the worm. The early worm gets eaten. - Norman Augustine

Airplanes are interesting toys but of no military value. - Marechal Ferdinand Foch

The bird is powered by its own life and by its motivation. - Abdul Kalam

I never wanted to weigh more heavily on a man than a bird. - Coco Chanel

If one cannot catch the bird of paradise, better take a wet hen. - Nikita Krushchev

When you aim for perfection, you discover it's a moving target. - George Fisher

A bird in the hand is a certainty, but a bird in the bush may sing. - Bret Harte

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. - Steven Wright

Like the herd animals we are, we sniff warily at the strange one among us. - Loren Eiseley

A piece of spaghetti or a military unit can only be led from the front end. - George S Patton

Books are no different from goats - they enjoy an afternoon out on the lawn. - Kate Bernheimer

I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it. - Steven Wright

The bird, the bee, the running child are all the same to the sliding glass door. - Demetri Martin

A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer; it sings because it has a song. - Lou Holtz

Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly. - Lanston Hughes

I am no bird; and no net ensnares me; I am a free human being with an independent will. - Charlotte Bronte

We are discreet sheep; we wait to see how the drove is going, and then go with the drove. - Mark Twain

My husband, Fang, is so dumb I once said, "There's a dead bird." He looked up. - Phyllis Diller

Samson, he takes the jawbone out of the grass and he kills the whole army of the Phillipines. - Archie Bunker

It used to be that when all else failed, a guy went into the army; now he becomes a consultant. - Blackie Sherrod

Moses was the greatest legislator and the commander in chief of perhaps the first liberation army. - Elie Wiesel

We could not understand that there was anything about a bird that could not be built on a larger scale. - Orville Wright

The reason there are so many tree-lined boulevards in Paris is so the German army can march in the shade. - George S Patton

I think we consider too much the good luck of the early bird and not enough the bad luck of the early worm. - Franklin D Roosevelt

If you're riding ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there. - Will Rogers

My other brother-in-law died. He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself. - Henny Youngman

New York is my Lourdes where I go for spiritual refreshment...a place where you are least likely to be bitten by a wild goat. - Brendan Behan

You are Mr. Owl. I am Ms. Hummingbird. We may come from different species but as long as you're a bird, I'm a bird too. - Glad Munaiseche

If I were a flower,
humming bird would be my favourite bee
And If I were blind,
the light of darkness I'd love to see - Munia Khan


see also   Country  &  Nationality  Sections
Afghan Livestock Management
Afghanistan Map - Revised Edition
Miss Afghanistan Finalists

 

Fear Of Light

Maiden Rock Illusion

Why Men Shouldn't Babysit

Noodle Art

Windows Scoreboard

Mummy Dogs

Swimming Without Getting Your Hair Wet

Media Bondage

Redneck ATV

Duct Tape - for a Prettier World

Don't Get Your Head In A Knot

Cornfield Fishing

Dawn Gone

Highest Human Position In The World

Together Since

You Never Call

CLUMSY Driver

Water Short

Post Research

Motorcycle Taxi
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21-Aug-2019