Monk’s Fish And Chip Stand

How to help cash flow problems at a monastery


A monastery in the English countryside was having a hard time with its cash flow because of the dwindling number of monks available to help with all the work.

Then one day two of the monks, who had been discussing the problem, suggested they open a fish and chips stand down on the highway, right next to a scenic vista area popular with tourists. The other monks agreed, and the two put up the stand.

One day a tourist who wanted to offer a compliment asked the monk on duty, “Are you the fish friar?”

“No, sir,” retorted the brother, “I’m the chip monk.”


QuotaBills
I got bigger fish to fly - Archie Bunker

There's always a bigger fish. - Qui-Gon Jinn

Tea is a religion of the art of life. - Okakura Kakuzo

Fish and visitors stink after three days. - Benjamin Franklin

You know why fish are so thin? They eat fish. - Jerry Seinfeld

Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days. - Benjamin Franklin

The English contribution to world cuisine. The chip. - John Cleese

The atheist religion don't believe in the bible. - Archie Bunker

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. - Gloria Steinem

There is only one religion, though there are a hundred versions of it. - George Bernard Shaw

Fish die belly upward, and rise to the surface. Its their way of falling. - Andre Gide

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

There is a world of practical religion in simply being considerate of others. - Roger Babson

To be religious is to have a life that flows with the presence of the extraordinary. - Ann Belford Ulanov

I'm a Catholic deer hunter. I am happy to be clinging to my guns and my religion. - Paul Ryan

They laughed at Robert Fulton but without him, New York wouldn't have a fish market. - Archie Bunker

Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are after. - Henry David Thoreau

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

Religion is like a map. The route isn't important. It's the destination that matters. - Marianne Williamson

Are you saying that the Rebel Alliance were religious terrorists and Yoda was a benefit cheat? - Dave Turner

He was of the faith chiefly in the sense that the church he currently did not attend was Catholic. - Kingsley Amis

When they see me holding fish, they can see that I am comfortable with kings as well as with paupers. - Imelda Marcos

The Bible, if ya read it you'd know. It's right in the beginning there, in the Book of Generous. - Archie Bunker

The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes. - Mark Twain

The task of organized religion is not to prove that God was in the 1st century, but that he is in the 20th. - S.H. Miller

Family, religion, friendship... these are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business. - Mr. Burns

The whole religious complexion of the modern world is due to the absence from Jerusalem of a lunatic asylum. - Havelock Ellis

The Muslim world is threatened by religious fanaticism. The Western world is threatened by secular fanaticism. - Dennis Prager

I refuse to believe that trading recipes is silly. Tuna-fish casserole is at least as real as corporate stock. - Barbara Harrison

It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand. - Mark Twain

The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson

He who begins with Metaphysics will not only become confused in matters of religion, but will fall into complete infidelity. - Maimonides

The Muslim Prophet Mohammed was a big believer in charity and firmly established helping those in need as a basis of the religion. - Richard Engel

I am quite sure now that often in matters concerning religion and politics, a man's reasoning powers are not above the monkeys. - Mark Twain

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. - Albert Einstein

People are so shocked when they find... out I am Protestant. I am Presbyterian. And I go to church, and I love God, and I love my church. - Donald Trump

Every sort of energy and endurance, of courage and capacity for handling life's evils, is set free in those who have religious faith. - William James


see also   Christmas  &  Religious  Sections
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Chipwrecked
Friar Thumper
Greek Monk
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Monk’s Christmas Vow
Monk’s Story
Silent Monks Singing Hallelujah
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26-Feb-2017