A young
soldier, just before battle, told his sergeant that he didn’t have a rifle.
“That’s no problem, son,” said the sergeant. “Here, take this broom. Just
point it at the Germans, and go ‘Bangety Bang Bang’.”
“But what about a bayonet, Sarge?” asked the young (and gullible) recruit.
The sergeant pulls a piece of straw from the end of the broom, and attaches it to the
handle end. “Here, use this... just go, ‘Stabity Stab Stab’.”
The recruit ends up alone on the battlefield, holding just his broom. Suddenly, a German
soldier charges at him.
The recruit points the broom. “Bangety Bang Bang!” The German falls dead. More
Germans appear. The recruit, amazed at his good luck, goes “Bangety Bang Bang!
Stabity Stab Stab!” He mows down the enemy by the dozens.
Finally, the battlefield is clear, except for one German soldier walking slowly toward
him. “Bangety Bang Bang!” shouts the recruit.
The German keeps coming.
“Bangety Bang Bang!” repeats the recruit, to no avail. He gets desperate.
“Bangety Bang Bang! Stabity Stab Stab!”
It’s no use. The German keeps coming. He stomps the recruit into the ground, and says...
“Tankety Tank Tank.”
All's fair in love and war. - John Lyly
The gun is not out of Irish politics. - Ian Paisley
A gun gives you the body, not the bird. - Henry David Thoreau
If we don't end war, war will end us. - H G Wells
The army is the true nobility of our country. - Napoleon III
He everywhere sought excuses for stirring up war. - Livy
Sometime they'll give a war and nobody will come. - Carl Sandburg
Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop. - H L Mencken
All diplomacy is a continuation of war by other means. - Zhou Enlai
Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality. - Jules de Gaultier
War is only a cowardly escape from the problems of peace. - Thomas Mann
The true champion loses many battles before winning the war. - Unknown
World War II was the last government program that really worked. - George Will
The only thing I’m afraid of is a life without you, Pigeon. - Jamie McGuire
A conquering army on the border will not be stopped by eloquence. - Otto von Bismarck
Mankind must put an end to war, or war will put an end to mankind. - John F Kennedy
In peace sons bury their fathers, but in war fathers bury their sons. - Croesus
It is well that war is so terrible, or we should grow too fond of it. - Robert E Lee
When starting and waging war it is not right that matters, but victory. - Adolf Hitler
Those who love peace must learn to organize as well as those who love war. - Martin Luther King, Jr.
Never think that war, no matter how necessary, nor how justified, is not a crime. - Ernest Hemingway
When I take a gun in hand, the safest place for a pheasant is just opposite the muzzle. - Sydney Smith
An army of deer led by a lion is more to be feared than an army of lions led by a deer. - Philip II
In any war, the first casualty is common sense, and the second is free and open discussion. - James Reston
Samson, he takes the jawbone out of the grass and he kills the whole army of the Phillipines. - Archie Bunker
Disease is war with the laws of our being, and all war, as a great general has said, is hell. - Lewis G. Janes
It used to be that when all else failed, a guy went into the army; now he becomes a consultant. - Blackie Sherrod
You can't say that civilization don't advance... in every war they kill you in a new way. - Will Rogers
For a war to be just three conditions are necessary - public authority, just cause, right motive. - Ernest Hemingway
The reason there are so many tree-lined boulevards in Paris is so the German army can march in the shade. - George S Patton
I hate war as only a soldier who has lived it can, only as one who has seen its brutality, its stupidity. - Dwight D Eisenhower
Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man. - Benjamin Franklin
It no longer makes economic sense to send an advertising message to the many in hopes of persuading the few. - M. Lawrence Light
In July of 2004, I came out strongly against the war with Iraq because it was going to destabilize the Middle East. - Donald Trump
Frankly, I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry. - Joseph Heller
The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular? - David Sarnoff
Maybe the answer to Selective Service is to start everyone off in the army and draft them for civilian life as needed. - Bill Vaughan
The only difference between a pigeon and the American farmer today is that a pigeon can still make a deposit on a John Deere. - Jim Hightower
We discern across the centuries a commanding and versatile intelligence, wielding with equal force the sword of war and of justice. - Winston Churchill
see also Army, Military & Stress Sections
German Coast Guard
German Efficiency
German Electrician (PG)
German Forest
Grouchy German
HeidleBurger
Rare Photo of 1940 Tour de France
Urgent World War I Message
Young German Fan
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