Doctor’ed Birthday Cake

Special cake topping for the wife’s birthday


For his wife’s birthday party, a Doctor ordered a cake with this inscription:

You are not getting older.
You are just getting better.

Asked how he wanted the message arranged, he said, “Just put ‘You are not getting older’ at the top and ‘You are just getting better’ at the bottom.”

It wasn’t until the good Doctor was ready to serve the cake that he discovered that the cake read:

YOU ARE NOT GETTING OLDER AT THE TOP.
YOU ARE JUST GETTING BETTER AT THE BOTTOM.


QuotaBills
Let them eat cake. - Marie Antoinette

I told you I was sick. - B.P. Roberts

Diabetes taught me discipline. - Sonia Sotomayor

No doctor is better than three. - German Proverb

I think I can wipe out diabetes. - Robert Atkins

One doctor makes work for another. - English Proverb

Diabetes is a lousy, lousy disease. - Elaine Stritch

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - American Saying

God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin

The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin

The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker

Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet

The doctors X-rayed my head an found nothing. - Dizzy Dean

She tells enough white lies to ice a wedding cake. - Margot Asquith

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it. - Boris Johnson

Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx

After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. - WC Fields

The doctor is often more to be feared than the disease. - French Proverb

If you wish to die young, make your physician your heir. - Romania Proverb

I have friends struggling with autism, juvenile diabetes. - Nicole A. Parker

A sweating ovary or a sick prostate explains most history. - Martin H. Fischer

Once you get rid of integrity the rest is a piece of cake. - Larry Hagman

I'm never sick. Why get sick? It's a waste of time. - Martha Stewart

Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it. - Ovid

Trips to the dentist - I like to postpone that kind of thing. - Johnny Depp

Psychiatrist: an M.D. who can't stand the sight of blood. - Unknown

Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined. - Samuel Goldwyn

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes

Writing is only the frosting on my cake. I'm whole without it. - Tabitha King

She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon. - Groucho Marx

"Let 'em eat cake," to quote the late Mark Antonette. - Archie Bunker

The patient is not likely to recover who makes the doctor his heir. - Thomas Fuller

NyQuil on the rocks, for when you're feeling sick but sociable. - Mitch Hedberg

If a patient cannot clean his teeth, no dentist can clean them for him. - Martin H. Fischer

The worst thing about medicine is that one kind makes another necessary. - Elbert Hubbard

My idea of baking is buying a ready-make cake mix and throwing in an egg. - Cilla Black

Doctors think a lot of patients are cured who have simply quit in disgust. - Don Herold

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick - not wounded - dead. - Woody Allen

Faith and knowledge lean largely upon each other in the practice of medicine. - Peter Mere Latham

It is said to be the manner of hypochondriacs to change often their physician. - William Cullen

This is a sharp medicine, but it is a physician for all diseases and miseries. - Sir Walter Raleigh

Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice. - Ethel Merman

He's the best physician that knows the worthlessness of the most medicines. - Benjamin Franklin

I don't follow trends. I make each cake for a particular wedding, or event. - Ron Ben-Israel

On my 85th birthday, I felt like a 20-year-old. But there wasn't one around. - Milton Berle

The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift

Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"? - George Carlin

A psychiatrist is a man who goes to Les Folies Bergere and looks at the audience. - Mervyn Stockwood

I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for. - James H. Boren

I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake. - Mitch Hedberg

First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin

The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley

People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca

As a child, I always chose a false nose and some face paint and a wig for my birthday. - Ashley Jensen

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

Stress exacerbates any problem, whether it's diabetes, heart trouble, MS, or whatever. - Mary Ann Mobley

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. - Robert Frost

The practice of medicine occurs even in primitive society, but law accompanies civilization. - Saying

I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne

Dentist: a prestidigitator who, putting metal into your mouth, pulls coin out of your pocket. - Ambrose Bierce

Let your entrance into the sick room decrease, not increase, the irritability of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer

A physician buries his mistakes, a dentist pulls them out, but a teacher has to live with them. - Unknown

I wondher why ye can always read a doctor's bill an' ye niver can read his purscription. - Finley Peter Dunne

The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient, whilst Mother Nature takes care of the cure. - Voltaire

Psychiatrist: a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free. - Unknown

German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton

Get well cards have become so humorous that if you don't get sick you're missing half the fun. - Flip Wilson

I was determined to share my positive approach and not let diabetes stand in the way of enjoying my life. - Paula Deen

Kindness and a generous spirit go a long way. And a sense of humor. It's like medicine - very healing. - Max Irons

One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer

What if the kid you bullied at school, grew up, and turned out to be the only surgeon who could save your life? - Lynette Mather

The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot. - Jay Leno

Dear Diamond,
We all know who is really a girl's best friend.
Yours sincerely,
Chocolate Cake - Unknown

People ask me what I'd most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. I tell them, a paternity suit. - George Burns

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis

I was diagnosed with diabetes at age 18. I didn't know what it was, so I went to the library and looked it up. - Ron Santo

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

'Tis not always in a physician's power to cure the sick; at times the disease is stronger than trained art. - Ovid

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow. - O.S. Marden

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker

The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler

The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers

Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden

I like to eat pizza and spaghetti pomodoro, and I'm crazy for dessert. I like all of them: cassata, cheesecake, biscuits. - Stefano Gabbana

Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer

How come if you mix flour and water together you get glue? And when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go? - Rita Rudner

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

Sometimes, giving up your privacy is a little like going to the dentist and we have let him have access that no one's ever had. - Tom Petty

It's a piece of cake until you get to the top. You find you can't stop playing the game the way you've always played it. - Richard M Nixon

Doctors are saying that each piece of bacon you eat takes 9 minutes off of your life. Based on that math, I should have died in 1732. - Unknown

I do not have a psychiatrist and I do not want one, for the simple reason that if he listened to me long enough, he might become disturbed. - James Thurber

A neurotic is a man who builds a castle in the air. A psychotic is the man who lives in it. And a psychiatrist is a man who collects the rent. - Lord Webb-Johnson


see also   Birthday,  Doctor  &  Marriage  Sections
Bacon Birthday Cake
Big Birthday Surprise
Birthday Dog
Blonde’s Birthday Task
Cake Message
Centennial Puff
Cheap Birthday Card
Crowded Birthday Party
DJ Birthday
Doctor Types
Family Birthday Reminder
Hippy Birthday
Jurassic Judah
Perfect Birthday Excuse
Redneck Birthday Cake
Shark Week Birthday Cake
“Underneath That” Cake
Woodcutter Birthday Cake

 

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16-Feb-2019